The E-League playoffs start May 1.

What’s the E-League? It’s a Santa Monica-based celebrity basketball league. Though its Web site is hardly basketball-reference.com, the league does provide box scores for every game.

The records contain a hilarious roster of exactly the type of celebrities you’d expect would have time for such a thing, and attendance is spotty among the ones I’ve heard of. The kid who played McLovin’ almost never shows up.

The best player in the league, by far, appears to be Brian McKnight’s son, Brian Jr., who’s not really a celebrity. Bill Bellamy is pretty good when he plays, which I imagine must be completely intolerable for everyone else on the court.

Wood Harris, the actor who played Avon Barksdale in The Wire, might not be a suit-wearing businessman, but he’s more than just a gangster, I suppose: He has a fine scoring touch.

But one celebrity baller deserves credit not for his play, but for an attendance record that stands head and shoulders above those of all other celebrities who have ever graced the pages of any glossy magazines:

I’m talking about Dean Cain.

While the more current and relevant stars like the Jamies Foxx and Kennedy get pulled away from the league by their duties performing in Oscar-bait like Ray and Malibu’s Most Wanted, Dean Cain apparently had nothing better to do than show up for six of the Boston team’s seven games for which the E-League’s site has box scores posted.

And though the man who once played Clark Kent is hardly a Superman on the hardwood, his teammates can count on him for a handful of points and workmanlike efforts on the boards weekly, even as their squad is mired near the basement of the E-League’s Eastern Conference.

Maybe Taye Diggs steals the spotlights and the ladies’ hearts on the rare occasion he does show up for Cain’s Boston team, and maybe someone named Jarod Paige is a more potent offensive weapon, but Boston fans can count on Cain cleaning up the glass weekly, sweat glistening from his once-chiseled jawline.

Where is teammate Joel McHale, listed on Boston’s roster but almost never in attendance? Who knows? Probably off filming Community. Cain is not Joel McHale’s keeper. (Sorry.)

The E-League playoffs include every team in the league, so Cain’s Boston club has a longshot chance at the league championship, scheduled for May 8. Given the squad’s performance, though, it would take a miracle for the Boston squad to advance that far. Something only a real Superman could accomplish, or at the very least the promise that Cash Warren could pull himself away from sitting around wondering how he got so lucky in life to finally suit up for his E-League unit.

Still, at least one E-League enthusiast and analyst — this one, who’d never heard of the league until about an hour ago — will call shenanigans on the whole affair if Dean Cain is not named to the Eastern Conference’s All-Star team that weekend.

Because though Cain’s contributions to Boston may not present themselves in the box score, he has reliably presented himself in the gym, week in and week out. That sort of leadership cannot be measured, and though it’s hardly superhuman, it’s damn-near heroic.