Away from the batting cages, McGwire’s team is producing — check that, reproducing — way above the league average.

Big Mac and wife Stephanie McGwire hit a triple on Tuesday, giving birth to three girls.

– David Brown, Big League Stew.

Remember my Army of Mark McGwires scenario? Looks as though the McGwires themselves are doing their very best to realize it.

Granted, you may balk and point out that Stephanie McGwire gave birth to three female McGwires, but I am certain that any McGwire progeny, regardless of gender, will develop the capacity to crush monstrous home runs and play terrible defense. And I’d guess they’ll probably end up sporting some bushy red goatees, too. Sorry, girls. Here’s hoping for your sake you got your mom’s looks, but I assume your father’s DNA is overwhelmingly powerful and dominant.

The good news is that since Mark McGwire already had three children, the McGwires are now just one more set of triplets away from being able to field a full nine. Since, in the original scenario, the McGwires were interchangeable, Team McGwire would not have to worry about a bullpen or pitching rotation. They will simply rotate which McGwire pitches to make sure all the McGwires stay healthy enough to smash epic dingers.