Last one:

There were a few questions about the Doritos Loco Taco, which is, of course, the Taco Bell taco made with a Nacho-Cheese Doritos shell. I haven’t had one yet. I have heard rumors that they’re available at the Taco Bell on 14th and 5th here in Manhattan, but no one has confirmed this for me. Can anyone? Anyone live down there want to walk over and check it out? I don’t want to waste a subway ride if they don’t have ’em. Can you, like, call a Taco Bell and ask for the menu? Do Taco Bells even have phones?

As for the @TacoBell Twitter account’s staunch refusal to acknowledge me, I’m at a loss. I mean, I get that they’re not likely to say anything when I call out the Worst Taco Bell in the World — on Route 9A in Elmsford, N.Y. — for being the worst Taco Bell in the world. But you can’t hook a brother up with knowledge of test markets? I guess they like to keep that stuff under wraps so I don’t, I don’t know, impact their market research or something. But still!

According to the website-about-a-website WeFollow.com, I am the second most influential Taco Bell Twitterer on the Twitter, behind the @TacoBellCanada account. You’ll note that the official @TacoBell account, despite over 120K followers, does not even make the list. Now it could simply be that the team of marketing interns at Taco Bell running the account never thought to submit it to the relatively useless WeFollow.com, or — or! — it could be that by WeFollow.com’s complicated system it has determined that I am just a significantly more influential Taco Bell-themed Twitter user than Taco Bell’s corporate account.

So maybe they’re jealous, is what I’m saying.

I agree wholeheartedly. If Bloomberg doesn’t ride the new roller coasters, it says: “I am a resident of the five boroughs that is not interested in checking out all my local roller-coaster options, so I am sort of lame.” And, without delving too deeply into politics, that’s just not a message I think I’d want to send if I were ever mayor.

Coney Island is sweet. One of the many things I miss about living in Brooklyn is the ability to ride my bike down to the Coney Island boardwalk to check out its weird mix of awesome things to do and macabre urban-carnival decay, much of which, I understand, isn’t there anymore. But I suppose now there’s new stuff to do there that will itself in time become forlorn and creepy. So that’s exciting.

Over.