When we think of Zubaz today, “utilitarian” probably isn’t the first word that pops into our heads. However, friends Bob Truax and Dan Stock actually had a practical purpose in mind when they created the garish pants. Truax and Stock owned a Minnesota gym that was popular with bodybuilders. The bodybuilding clientele had a problem: the hardcore weightlifters couldn’t find pants or shorts that comfortably fit their massive thighs while offering the flexibility they needed in workouts.

– Ethan Trex, Mental Floss.

This link comes from our man @dpecs, and man, there’s a lot here. First things first: How is it possible that the dudes responsible for Zubaz are named “Truax and Stock”? Why did they bother coming up with a name for their pants besides “Truax”? To me, the name Truax perfectly befits wide-legged, zebra-striped pants with elastic waistbands aimed at weightlifters. In fact, I think if they’d have gone with a slightly different approach, Truax and Stock could be as synonymous with competitive bodybuilding as Abercrombie and Fitch are with lacrosse. Totally failed business opportunity there, if you ask me.

You should click through and read the rest of the Mental Floss piece. It turns out the history of Zubaz is precisely as fascinating as you’d expect.

I myself owned a pair of L.A. Raiders Zubaz in the early 1990s. They had silver lightning bolts on them and they were totally sweet. I can’t find a picture online. I should note, I guess, that I played pee-wee football for the East Rockaway Raiders, so even though I was always a Jets fan I had a ton of Raiders gear when I was a little kid. I must have looked pretty badass for a fifth grader, decked out in black and silver all the time. Probably not, actually. But I sure thought I did.

Anyway I’m pretty sure I trashed the Zubaz with the rest of my sweatpants when I hit sixth grade. For some reason — and chime in here if this happened in your town too — there was some strict but unwritten rule that you were absolutely not to wear sweatpants to middle school. It sucked. Sweatpants are great, and in fifth grade I must have worn sweatpants to school every day from October to April. But apparently if you ever dared show up at middle school in anything besides jeans you’d be forever ostracized. I never took my chances.