Influenced by food deconstruction masters such as Jose Andreas and Ferran Adria of El Bulli, David’s ‘Beyond Gourmet’™ jelly beans will enable one to create haute cuisine and exotic dishes using the taste elements of each jelly bean. It’s beyond candy! It’s literally an exotic trip around the world though the sense of taste via never-before-tasted jelly bean flavors. Imagine creating a Thai Lemongrass Curry or an Indian Mango Chutney dish by constructing complex dishes in your mouth, and giving it an explosion of taste that hits all your senses.

As part of the David’s Signature “Beyond Gourmet” Jelly Beans™ line-up, a very exclusive product featuring a “special blend” of the rarest and most exotic ingredients in the world will be enveloped in a 24-karat gold bean. They will be packaged in an exquisite Crystal jar and priced at $500. The 24-karat beans will be under armed guard at the show and are the most expensive jelly beans ever created in jelly bean history.

– PRWeb.com.

Yeah you heard right: Jelly beans that literally take you on an exotic trip around the world. That $500 price tag sounds a hell of a lot more reasonable when you realize jelly-bean mastermind David Klein has unlocked the secret of jelly-bean fueled human teleport. Just eat a jelly bean and you’re literally in Thailand.

Seriously though, this can’t be for real, right? PRWeb.com appears reasonably legit so it’s a pretty elaborate hoax if they’re kidding, but there’s just no way someone’s sincerely, unironically planning to sell 24-karat gold-leafed $500 jelly beans. Right? IN THIS ECONOMY!?

Also, I really like that they feel the need to mention that these are the most expensive jelly beans ever created “in jelly bean history.” I guess that implies that the person writing the press release is doing it with his tongue at least a tiny bit in cheek, but I like to imagine he needed to specify because there have been more expensive jelly beans in other, alternate, non-jelly bean histories. I’m blowing your mind right now, I know.