For the Kansas City Star, Sam Mellinger writes an excellent feature about Carlos Beltran upon the outfielder’s return to Kauffman Stadium. Go read it.

The first comment:

What I remember most about Carlos is is selfish moody play especially on the tough days when the ream was getting shut out he would go a careless 0 for 4. Then when the team was romping some one he was 5 for 5. We didn’t win with him so why wish we had the selfish bum??

Can that possibly be real and not satire? It’s almost too perfect.