Category Archives: Culture Jammin’

Scientists perform dumbest study ever

Posted on by
5

When asked to rate their feelings on a scale of 0 to 100, with 100 being “very good,” the people having sex gave an average rating of 90. That was a good 15 points higher than the next-best activity, exercising, which was followed closely by conversation, listening to music, taking a walk, eating, praying and meditating, cooking, shopping, taking care of one’s children and reading. Near the bottom of the list were personal grooming, commuting and working….

On average throughout all the quarter-million responses, minds were wandering 47 percent of the time. That figure surprised the researchers, Matthew Killingsworth and Daniel Gilbert.

“I find it kind of weird now to look down a crowded street and realize that half the people aren’t really there,” Dr. Gilbert says….

Whatever people were doing, whether it was having sex or reading or shopping, they tended to be happier if they focused on the activity instead of thinking about something else. In fact, whether and where their minds wandered was a better predictor of happiness than what they were doing.

– John Tierney, N.Y. Times.

OK, first of all, Harvard researchers: Perhaps you can’t comprehend this from the comforts of your ivory tower, but none of the people who said they were having sex was actually having sex. No one’s stopping to answer your damn iPhone survey. I can practically guarantee that every single one of those respondents was a giggling middle-schooler.

Second, what? Just… what? So you’re trying to make broad sweeping conclusions about a field as complex and mysterious as psychology by asking people to rate their feelings on a scale of 1-to-100? What does that even mean?

How do I know how happy I am right now, out of 100? I’m pretty happy, but maybe I’ve never even achieved 100 happiness. And if my current psychological state is just amusement at how stupid your study is, does that count as happiness, even if it’s inherently snarky happiness? It’s all completely arbitrary.

Besides — you’re telling me that people whose minds wander are less happy. But how is it even possible to truly rate your current feelings on a 1-to-100 scale without comparing it to the ways you’ve felt at other times in your life? And then, if you’re thinking about those other times, isn’t your mind wandering?

And the quote from Dr. Gilbert. Really? So if I’m walking down the street and I’m thinking about anything besides walking down the street, that means I’m not really there? What? Is my mind not part of my physical person? I’m there, in the flesh, on the street. So is my mind. I just have other things to think about besides, “derp dee derp derp derp, I’m a walkin’ down the street!”

In fact, I often go for walks specifically to let my mind wander. And I love the walks when I am able to let my thoughts stray far from the activity and my physical setting, on tangents off tangents. Those are the times I feel most creative and confident.

So how about this, Harvard researchers: You continue your dumbf@#$ studies, and please, be mindful of every step along the way. When you make photocopies of your findings, just stand there by the photocopier thinking, “makin’ copies; makin’ copies; makin copies,” with every new print.

I’ll be here, daydreaming my damn life away and enjoying every minute of it.

Ridiculous cast, excellent McCartney imitation

Posted on by
3

I was discussing Paul McCartney with former roommate and maverick economist Ted Burke, and he reminded me of the following sketch from The Dana Carvey Show.

Check out the cast: That’s Robert Smigel (of Triumph the Insult Comic Dog/TV Funhouse/Just about everything funny that’s ever happened fame) as Ringo, and a certain future Comedy Central pundit as George Harrison.

Also, Carvey’s short-lived show (which switched presenting sponsors every week and was briefly The Taco Bell Dana Carvey Show) counted the following among its writers: Steve Carell, Stephen Colbert, Dave Chappelle, Louis C.K., Charlie Kaufman and Smigel. I should probably acquire the DVD.

Part 2 here. EASTER EGG: A sandwich.

He also hates irony

Posted on by
3

A trip to a Taco Bell restaurant turned into Taco Hell for Jon Gosselin and his girlfriend Ellen Ross after the infamous reality star was recognized at a drive-thru. RadarOnline.com has the complaint filed regarding the incident.

The Jon And Kate Plus 8 star’s girlfriend was so outraged at their treatment at the drive-thru of the restaurant in Lemoyne, Pennsylvania, that she made an official complaint demanding that one of the employees concerned -– “the one with the wrap” around her head –- be fired.

On October 18, 2010, one of the servers tried to take a photograph of Gosselin on their cell phone, causing the seemingly publicity shy pair to become increasingly outraged about their treatment.

– RadarOnline.com.

So get this: A reality TV “star” who bartered his family’s privacy for money and fame is now pissed that Taco Bell employees recognize him and want to take his photograph.

The Radar Online report includes the complaint, and it’s basically that — a bunch of employees recognized Gosselin and gathered at their side of the drive-thru window to look at him, and one tried to photograph him.

For that treatment, of course, Gosselin and his girlfriend are demanding that a presumably minimum-wage (or barely above) employee of the Taco Bell be fired.

Here I thought Jon Gosselin had more class!

Kudos to him for appreciating fine fast food, though.

Video game banning?

Posted on by
1

“Some of the Grimm’s fairy tales are quite grim. Are you going to ban them too?” the Justice asked. Justice Sonia Sotomayor later added the example of violent rap music to the list of media that are currently protected by the First Amendment.

Morazzini argued that the level of violence in videogames was particularly high compared to other media.

Scalia retorted, “That same argument could have been made when movies first came out. They could have said, oh, we’ve had violence in Grimm’s fairy tales, but we’ve never had it live on the screen. I mean, every time there’s a new technology, you can make that argument.”

– Oliver Chiang, Forbes.

This is an interesting topic but one I’m not really qualified to weigh in on, since they didn’t start putting age recommendations on video games until after I was over 18 and since I haven’t purchased a video game in at least five years. I don’t even know how they currently restrict children from purchasing violent video games, and to be honest, I can’t really figure it out from the Internet. Is it a store-by-store thing? Are there no restrictions at all, like with music with the old “Parental Advisory: Explicit Lyrics” label on it?

In any case, I’d generally say the onus should be on parents and guardians to police what video games their kids are playing and to make sure everyone involved understands that video games are not real and video-game actions should not be reenacted in real life.

I only bring it up here because of a comment from Julie in South Carolina on a post I made a couple of months ago, in which I said I didn’t have any moral or ethical issue with hunting but didn’t think I could ever actually bring myself to shoot an animal. She wrote:

While one would not expect to change your mind about hunting, you probably don’t think twice about playing a video game that involves killing people.

And here’s the thing: She’s absolutely right. I don’t think twice about playing a video game that involves killing people, because I recognize that it’s a video game, and killing a little video-game person is very different from killing a majestic buck in the forest.

In fact, I played a good hour’s worth of Grand Theft Auto this weekend, and I didn’t even bother playing the missions or whatever; I just plugged in the cheat code for all the weapons then blew up as much stuff as I could, over and over again. At no point did I confuse the virtual world with the real one. And when I left to go home, I felt no temptation to stop a passing motorist, kick his ass, shoot him, and take his car.

Just like American Psycho didn’t make me want to become a serial killer and Reservoir Dogs didn’t make me want to torture someone while listening to Stealers Wheel.

Of course I’m a grown-ass man now so I’m hardly the person these bans would target.