Taco in a taco?

Despite their fans’ demand that they deep fry a taco on a stick, the Twins concession folks have taken the easy way out and brought in local vendor El Burrito Mercado and their Walk A Taco instead. In following the other Midwestern tradition of putting savory food in cones, Walk A Taco is essentially a taco salad in a crispy cone-shaped flour tortilla. It sounds delicious but also a bit dangerous. I’d wait for that thing to cool down lest you bite right into a hot molten volcano of cheese.

Rob Iracane, Big League Stew.

Iracane runs down the top 10 new concession items in baseball. Walk-a-Taco is most intriguing in my opinion, but there are a lot of promising ideas there. Stadium concessions are often out on the forefront of awesome greasy food innovation. Nothing from Citi Field hits the list, but there’s news that Nationals Park will soon have plenty delicious options familiar to Mets fans.

Twitter Q&A-style product

Hell yes it was awesome. Sad thing is I was in the press box, where fist-pumping is frowned upon.

What’s less awesome is it’s a moment that will certainly be overlooked by the trade-David-Wrong set next time he strikes out in the same spot. It’s like I said in my season preview: We expect Wright to come through all the time, so the spots where he does are hardly notable. Too many people remember the whiffs and forget the go-ahead doubles.

This is totally unscientific, but I expect Wright to return to his 2006-08 form in 2011. I can’t say why; maybe it’s the regime change, the new hitting coach, a stronger lineup around him, whatever. Could be just blind Mets-fan optimism.

Technically yes. I ate a sandwich that was of Cuban ancestry: The Fritas Cubana from Morro Castle in Little Havana. It’s a burger with sausage meat mixed into the patty, covered in crispy shoestring fried potatoes. Pretty excellent.

I did not eat a traditional pork/pickle/mustard pressed Cuban sandwich, though. That’s unfortunate because I really like those, but I figured I have had plenty of ’em before and I’d never had a Fritas Cubana. Plus the place I was hoping to have one — Las Olas Cafe in Miami Beach — is now closed. I did enjoy a Cuban sandwich of sorts the last time I was in Florida, in West Palm Beach.

I’m reasonably certain it’s just Starship’s “We Built This City” on infinite repeat.

Paul Assenmacher, and it’s not even close.

Well my first instinct is to just say astronaut ice cream on a roll, but did they have astronaut ice cream in 1969? When did astronauts get ice cream?

I’m thinking you need the sandwich to be patriotic, so Russian dressing is right out. Same goes for French and Italian, I suppose, and the Thousand Islands are a little too Canadian for this endeavor. Sad thing is there’s no “American dressing.” Does mayo count as American dressing? Mustard is too European. Ketchup seems to be of American origin, but I’m not sure I want to put ketchup on such a monumental sandwich. No disrespect.

This is hard; I’m trying to think like a 1969 deli owner. How’s this: I take turkey breast, cut it into strips and batter and deep fry it. Those, with Cheez Whiz — doesn’t get more American than Cheez Whiz — and some Open Pit barbecue sauce, the tangy red type (a nod to Tang, of course). And on a hero, obviously. Only problem is the red barbecue sauce and yellow cheese might look vaguely Soviet. Commies.

That’s a pretty gross sandwich in concept but I bet in reality it’d be pretty awesome. Especially in 1969, which is probably before a lot of good sandwiches had even come out. Why does no one make turkey fingers, anyway?

I’d probably call it The Apollo. Pretty mighty name for a sandwich.

As far as I’m concerned, yes. I’m something of a descriptivist when it comes to sandwiches. It has to be on a case by case basis, but generally as long as something is wrapped in starch and portable, it’s a sandwich. Thus, Jamaican beef patties are sandwiches. Wraps are sandwiches. Burritos are sandwiches. Empanadas? Sandwiches.

Kentucky hot brown: Not a sandwich. Delicious, undoubtedly, but the whole OG point of sandwiches is that you can eat them with your hands without getting your hands messy. Try that with a hot brown someday. Also, sounds like some sort of perverse thing you’d joke about in ninth grade.

Also, my friend Jake is fond of pointing out that Jamaican beef patties might be the world’s most consistent food. I’m not sure that this is certainly the case in Jamaica, but in Brooklyn pretty much every beef patty you can find — whether you’re getting them at the beef-patty place, the pizzeria, the bodega, wherever — tastes the same: Amazing.

 

What they’re building in Little Havana

The Florida Marlins’ new ballpark is right off I-95. Currently known as Miami Ballpark, it sits a few miles north of downtown Miami and about a dozen miles south of their current home, Sun Life Stadium nee Land Shark Stadium nee Dolphins Stadium nee Dolphin Stadium nee Pro Player Stadium nee Joe Robbie Stadium.

The new place is at the old Orange Bowl site, nestled into a residential neighborhood called Little Havana. One side faces 7th St, a local thoroughfare: pharmacies, gas stations, barber shops, nail salons.

The ballpark in progress is taking shape, a massive oval of glass and off-white concrete. It makes no effort toward nostalgia; parts of it look at least vaguely like a UFO, the massive supports for the retractable roof bracketing one side like some sort of fueling dock.

Around back, a chain-link fence separates the construction site from blocks and blocks of single and multi-family homes. A few — nearest the huge concrete parking garages — are boarded up or decorated with “FOR RENT” signs.

Most aren’t. The neighborhood shows all the familiar signs of people being people: Cars and bicycles, barbecues smoking on front patios, televisions glowing in windows. From a driveway, a remote control car speeds out into the street, kicking up dirt and gravel.

Six kids, ranging in age from about six to 12, play around a neon orange construction pylon separating the part of the street that’s still paved from the part that has been dug up. One boy holds an orange-painted stake, another drags some sort of thin metal bracket, scraping and rattling against the pavement. Up against the fence, construction junk deemed unworthy for play sits on a pile of rubble, alongside, for some reason, abandoned shoes.

By my count, there are 11 old shoes strewn among the detritus — only four total that are paired. Two pairs of shoes and seven strays. They are of all sorts and sizes: sneakers, pumps, loafers, sandals, Crocs.

A few blocks away, Morro Castle serves delicious Fritas Cubanas – a Cuban-style seasoned hamburger buried in crisp shoestring potatoes. The waitress speaks only Spanish, communicating with some customers (including this one) in a universal language of finger-points, gestures and smiles. A couple of teenagers in Miami Heat t-shirts rattle off their orders in Spanish, then converse in English.

Many baseball fans seem convinced that Major League Baseball just won’t work in South Florida. We say the Marlins have “no fans,” even though the Marlins – like all teams – decidedly do have fans. “No fans” is a quick way of saying they can’t boast a fanbase the size of the Mets’ or Yankees’ or Phillies’ or Red Sox’, but sit in the crowd at Sun Life and you’ll hear plenty passionate cheers and jeers, celebrating Hanley Ramirez for his hitting or excoriating him for his defense.

The current stadium is among baseball’s worst. A bland, mid-80s construction, it is surrounded by parking lots, far from the city, among expanses of strip malls. Its dimensions and sightlines are clearly built for football; many seats do not properly face the action. It can boast decent wings and an arepa stand. They play baseball there so the place cannot be unpleasant, but it adds little to the experience.

I’ve hardly been following the particulars of the new ballpark’s construction, but I assume it came with all the inevitable complaints, counter-complaints, ill will and taxes. I can’t say what the park means to the people of Miami and in the neighborhood or what it’ll do to traffic and local business. But it’s hard to imagine the upgrade won’t ultimately be good for the team.

The Marlins have a great (if relatively short) history, good players locked up under team control for a long time, and a front office that appears to know what it’s doing. They play in a big market where baseball is popular. Next year, they’ll have a new baseball-only ballpark in a residential neighborhood way closer to the city’s center.

Of course, owner Jeffrey Loria has been accused of pocketing revenue-sharing money and misleading the public about the team’s funds. But if a new stream of cash from ticket sales and advertising can increase the Marlins’ operating budget, they will become more competitive financially with the heavyweights in their division.

That might not sound pleasant to Mets fans, but it’s probably a good thing in the long run. Better stadiums make for better road trips, and better competition makes for better games.

Season in preview: The bullpen

Krod!

The bullpen in April: Francisco Rodriguez, Bobby Parnell, D.J. Carrasco, Taylor Buchholz, Tim Byrdak, Pedro Beato, Blaine Boyer

Overview: Besides the closer Rodriguez, the Mets’ bullpen is comprised of converted starters, non-tendered free agents and guys brought to camp on Minor League deals.

That sounds bad, but it’s not. Though “two closers” might make for sexier headlines, the best bullpens are often cobbled together on the cheap. Due partly to sample size, and presumably partly to usage, most big-league relievers’ performances fluctuate pretty wildly from year to year. As long as a team can find a host of promising arms and be willing to shake things up when necessary, it can build a successful relief corps.

By keeping Boyer, who had an out clause in his contract if he didn’t make the Major League team, the Mets had to send Manny Acosta and Pat Misch through waivers. Both pitchers cleared and will start the season in Triple-A Buffalo. Jason Isringhausen will open in extended Spring Training, building up arm strength and waiting for an opportunity when the big-league club loses a reliever to injury or ineffectiveness.

My colleague Mike Salfino is very bullish on Bobby Parnell. Parnell is among the game’s hardest throwers and induced a ton of groundballs last season. He needs to be able to control his slider to keep hitters off-balance, but he could easily emerge as the successor to Rodriguez.

Carrasco isn’t likely to dominate, but he was available at a relative discount and has been a decent Major League reliever for three straight seasons. Buchholz was great the last time he was fully healthy. Byrdak can get left-handers out (though Mets fans might have to adjust to the idea of a lefty specialist that needs occasional days off). The Rule 5 pick Beato converted to a relief role last year and posted a 2.11 ERA in Double-A. Boyer induces a ton of ground-balls.

And when he’s not disrupting the peace, Rodriguez has been a very good closer. The Mets will want to be careful with how they use him, since Rodriguez has an option on his contract that vests if he finishes 55 games, but he should be good whenever he pitches. Terry Collins has said he’ll be willing to use Rodriguez earlier than the ninth inning if the situation calls for it.

Collins has also mentioned a couple of times how he doesn’t like to get guys warmed up to not bring them in the game. That’s important, and a massive departure from the last couple years in Flushing. It remains to be seen how Collins will manage the Mets’ bullpen, but it’s hard to imagine him being worse at it than Jerry Manuel. The new administration seems more adamant about determining on its own when a player needs a rest day, not deferring to a professional athlete who will inevitably insist he’s ready to go.

Joe Pawlikowski at Fangraphs recently suggested the Mets’ bullpen will be a strength for the team, perhaps surprising the set disappointed that the team failed to bring on any big names this offseason. He’s right though. Though few of the Mets’ relievers are bona fide studs, the club has enough depth in its bullpen that it should be able to settle on a good mix of guys to finish out games.

The bullpen in September: Rodriguez, Parnell, and five other guys, a couple of whom are probably on the roster now. High turnover isn’t necessarily a bad thing in a bullpen.

Overview: The Braves’ bullpen, on paper at least, appears excellent. The Marlins’ crew looks good too. The Phillies’ won’t be great until Brad Lidge returns, but they should benefit from having starting pitchers eating up most of their innings. The Nationals’ bullpen, a strength last year, seems a bit top-heavy. But it’s pretty difficult to predict how bullpens will shake out, so I’ll take the safe guess and figure the Mets will wind up somewhere in the middle of the pack in their division.

Season in preview: Center field

El Caballo Loco…

The center fielders in April: Angel Pagan, Scott Hairston

Overview: Pretty sure Angel Pagan finally shook that incessant “fourth outfielder” label last season. He did it in the best way, too: By earning a starting job with exceptional play and avoiding the type of rare but memorable calamities that earned him an undeserved reputation for having a low baseball IQ.

By WAR, Pagan was the fifth-best center fielder in baseball in 2010. He plays exceptional defense, covering Citi Field’s outfield expanses. He can work an at-bat and draw a walk when he’s not getting anything to hit. He can drive the ball a bit. He burns up the basepaths. Though aesthetically dissimilar and not as powerful a hitter, Pagan excels in all phases of the game like his mentor Carlos Beltran did in his heyday. And he is thrilling to watch.

Pagan has also been tabbed as injury-prone, but few of his injuries have been related and at least one was of the freak variety: His shoulder-contusing in LA in 2008. Pagan is 29 and coming off a season and a half of being a really good player. There’s no reason to think he’ll be anything but that in 2011.

Scott Hairston should fill in when Pagan’s not playing, but ideally that won’t happen too often. Hairston’s bat plays pretty well in center, but he cannot field or get on base as well as Pagan. As I’ve mentioned before, people seem to think that Willie Harris is on the team to back up center field, but Hairston has more experience (and more recent experience) in the spot.

The center fielders in September: Pagan, Hairston.

How they stack up: The Braves have Nate McLouth in center field coming off a year in which he posted a .190/.298/.322 line. The Marlins will move converted infielder Chris Coghlan to center even though he was not a particularly great left fielder last year. He should hit well for the position, but his defense could be, well, typical of the Marlins. The Nationals seem to be unironically starting Rick Ankiel in center. The only player in the division that might be a match for Pagan is Shane Victorino, and I am not inclined to say anything nice about Shane Victorino in this space. Plus Pagan’s probably better anyway.

2011 Atlanta Braves preview

Patrick Flood is previewing the Mets’ opponents in the NL East. One quibble, though: He writes that “the only real knock on Tommy Hanson” is his inability to hold runners on, when we all know that the biggest knock on Tommy Hanson is that he’s first cousins with the band Hanson. Also, for what it’s worth, I think the Braves will win the division this year. They can’t boast the Phillies’ pitching staff, but they have a younger, deeper and better balanced team. I might get this into my Mets’ season preview, but in case I can’t, I’ll say it now: Braves, Phillies, Mets, Marlins, Nationals. Book it!

Top 5 food options at Digital Domain Park

Since today’s game is the Mets’ last Grapefruit League tilt, this won’t do any good for fans of the big club this year. But it’s by request, and maybe it’ll see a spike when people start Googling what to eat in advance of 2012’s Spring Training. Or something.

5. Nathan’s Hot Dog nuggets: Nathan’s fans from the Northeast may know these already; my sister has long been a fan. They are essentially miniature, dippable corn dogs. All the glory of hot dogs battered in cornmeal and deepfried, but without that pesky stick. They’re available down the left field line at Digital Domain Park. Maybe elsewhere too, but I’ve only seen them advertised there.

4. Deep fried Oreos: If you haven’t had a deep fried Oreo yet, you should. Not necessarily here in Port St. Lucie — though they’re plenty delicious here — anyplace they’re available. It’s almost impossible to imagine that a deep-fried Oreo could taste better than it sounds, but somehow it does. The cookie part of the Oreo softens up under the heat of the oil, so it’s like chocolate and sugar-stuffed fried dough. Oh, and then it’s topped with more sugar. They’re behind third base at Digital Domain, at a stand that serves deep-fried snickers and funnel-cake sticks as well.

3. Cheeseburger: I should be more specific: I mean the cheeseburger from the Ulti-Met Grill behind home plate. It’s not quite Shake Shack, but the real charcoal grill provides a beachy barbecue flavor that pairs well with the pace and climate of Grapefruit League baseball.

2. Hot pretzel: Crazy, right? There are fried Oreos in the park and I’m telling you the second-best thing is a hot pretzel, something you can get at any stadium in the country? Believe it. This is everything a ballpark pretzel could ever be. They are heated to order over hot charcoal, then salted if you so choose, then heated some more. These are not the lukewarm cardboard pretzels of Shea Stadium’s upper deck*. They are soft and piping hot, and they taste fresh. Also, the park offers both yellow and spicy brown mustard. I go with spicy brown, and I actually put a little ketchup on my pretzels as well. I’m weird like that.

1. Taco in a Helmet: Taco in a Helmet is a taco in a helmet.


*- Fun fact: Pretzels in the upper deck was the worst assignment — by far — for Shea Stadium vendors. They were terrible for commissions because they didn’t sell as well as beer, hot dogs, soda or cotton candy, and for some reason there was only one spot in the stadium that distributed pretzels: right behind home plate. For all other items there was a place on every level, but you had to haul pretzels from the field level to whatever level you were assigned. And that big silver pretzel-holder thing was a pain in the ass to get up to the upper deck. Often the assignment seemed like a punishment; the only times I ever got it were after I got caught wearing my hat backwards, which was a huge no-no in the eyes of Aramark.