Screw everything, it’s Bonus Sandwich

Look, the blogger-reader relationship is relatively simple: I give you something to read when you’re bored at work, and you stroke my ego by actually paying attention to my nonsensical blather.

But I do a lot for you. I do. You think these sandwiches eat themselves? C’mon. Eating tons of delicious sandwiches is a burden I bear for your benefit. And it’s not as easy as it sounds: Eating the sandwiches is a breeze, but finding a different sandwich to write about every week is a challenge.

A stunning confession: Sometimes, the Sandwich of the Week is not a sandwich I ate that week. Often — as will be the case this weekend — it’s a sandwich I ate a week or two earlier. And with the baseball season over and my workload at the studio lightened, I’ve had some more time to identify and devour interesting local sandwiches.

That creates a sort-of bottleneck situation: If there can be only one Sandwich of the Week, then I compile a backlog of sandwiches, and by the time I get to writing about them I struggle to remember all the details.

I also don’t do well with structure. Sometimes I don’t want to wait for the weekend and don’t want to bother with the rigid and completely arbitrary formatting demanded by Sandwich of the Week, with proper ratings and all that.

Sometimes I just want to write about sandwiches. That’s what follows here. As part of our blogger-reader relationship, you’ll just have to indulge me.

Following food trucks on Twitter is reasonably fascinating. First off, you get to see where they’re going and if they’re going to be reasonably near your workplace. Second, you learn that operating a food truck or cart in New York City essentially means perpetually jockeying with other vendors for prime placement and a constant struggle with law enforcement. The latter is something the Vendys organizers talked about a lot. But I guess I didn’t recognize just how big a problem it is for the vendors until I saw all the evidence on Twitter: street-meat heroes forced to pick up and move in the middle of what should be the lunch rush.

And it’s hard to fault the cops. If you’re selling schnitzel on the street, you’re going to create  a pretty good deal of foot traffic, and thousands of vendors operating unchecked in this ridiculously populous borough could bring about chaos. Meaty, delicious chaos.

I’m honestly not sure how the permit system works for street carts and food trucks, and where they are and are not allowed to operate. But while I was waiting on my sandwich at the Etravanganza stand on 52nd and Park, a cop came along and said something to the cart’s owner, who then asked the officer if he could just finish my sandwich before he packed up. Thankfully, the policeman obliged and walked away. Then the man in the cart said to me:

“This is every day. My dream is to open my own restaurant.”

I stepped back to examine the cart and noticed that it pretty clearly started as one of those coffee-and-donut breakfast stands. There were donuts and muffins in a plexiglass case, surrounded by signs advertising tacos, sandwiches, breakfast burritos, daily specials.

I don’t know for sure, but it seemed to me that this guy was creative and enterprising enough to take his humble breakfast cart to its logical extremes, using it to cook interesting foodstuffs and extend his business into lunchtime. So if I had to guess, I’d bet the cop was moving him along because he didn’t have the permit to sell so deep into the afternoon — it was already 2 p.m.

The cop was likely doing his job, then. But if I am choosing sides in a conflict, I will 100% of the time sympathize with the one serving me pork at a reasonable rate.

Which brings me, at long last, to the sandwich: Grilled cheese with bacon, chorizo and jalapenos on whole wheat bread. It looked like this:

So how was it? How do you think? It was a grilled-cheese sandwich with bacon, chorizo and jalapeno. All those things are awesome. As was this sandwich.

Despite all the additions, it was still, at its heart, a grilled-cheese sandwich. None of the fillings overwhelmed the buttery grilled bread or the molten American cheese inside.

(On American cheese, briefly: A lot of uppity food lovers often judge the hell out of American cheese, and I get it, I guess. It’s obviously not the best cheese or even a good cheese. Kraft singles are pretty much the definition of replacement level for cheese. But to me, grilled cheese is best with American. Yes, it’s processed, unnatural and unhealthy. Whatever, so are many delicious foods. And in this case I’m sandwiching it between two slices of bread practically slathered in butter)

The jalapeno and chorizo added a nice bit of spice — something I had somehow never considered might benefit a grilled cheese. Actually, I’m kind of baffled that I never thought to add sausage to a grilled cheese on my own, so massive kudos go to the cart’s owner for his ingenuity.

The bacon, I suppose, could have stood to be just a little more crispy, but that’s really nitpicking. For a $5 sandwich constructed under obvious time constraints, this was excellent.

Apropos of almost nothing

The Rodney McCray clip earlier prompted me to look up Rodney McCray’s brief stint with the Mets, which included 18 games but only one plate appearance — an RBI single — during the miserable 1992 season.

Then I looked up and down that team’s roster and realized there’s something funny to say about nearly every single guy who played from that team. Todd Hundley posted a .572 OPS. Howard Johnson played center field. Bill “wait ’til you see” Pecota was on the squad, as were Jeff McKnight, Willie Randolph and two-sport non-star D.J. Dozier.

But the name that really jumped out at me was Pat Howell, a center fielder who put up a .418 OPS over 31 games late that season, his only Major League stint. Howell couldn’t hit at all; he finished his career with a .603 Minor League OPS over 14 seasons.

He stuck around that long, presumably, because he played a great center field. And my lasting — nay, only — memory of Howell is that he made perhaps the best catch I’ve ever seen in person.

Don’t ask me the game, the day, the situation or the hitter. I don’t remember any of it. All I remember is a deep fly ball to dead center field and Pat Howell, running full tilt — and he could fly — making a leaping, over-the-shoulder grab.

When I think back on it and the mechanics of everything, it’s a bit unclear why he had to jump the way he did — it wasn’t a dive, just a leap, and he took off like it was a long-jump attempt. Howell wound up catching the ball in mid-flight just before both of his spikes hit the center field wall — just to the right of Shea’s 410 mark, if I recall correctly.

His momentum pushed his body forward but his spikes stayed attached the wall. He managed to stumble off the fence without falling, but the spikes made two small rips in the center field wall so a little bit of white padding showed through for the remainder of the game. It was cool.

Yikes

Mr. Arias, who makes his home in a gated community several miles from the dormitory, said he believed the academy would make a profit of about $1 million in signing bonuses this year. He said that he, Mr. Goodman and another investor each put about $400,000 into the venture.

At their dormitory, about a dozen players live in a house with small bedrooms, the players jammed in as if on a ship. In one, three bunk beds line a wall. At one point, Mr. Arias said, 30 players lived there.

“We need to upgrade the facility,” Mr. Goodman said. “I mean, we functioned this year without air-conditioning in the dormitory.”

Michael S. Schmidt, N.Y. Times.

Yikes. Schmidt’s entire piece on the Dominican baseball industry and its U.S. investors is worth a read. Not entirely surprising, but it sort of puts a human face on a bunch of stuff you could pretty much figure out was going on if you ever really thought about it. And I wonder if it was only a language barrier that prevented him from interviewing some of the teenage players for the story.

Last item of manager stuff until the Mets hire one

First, to reiterate something I’ve written about a billion times in the past two weeks: I think the role of field manager is wildly overrated by both fans and the media. I think there’s a baseline of baseball intellect and motivational ability present in all men deemed worthy of Major League managing jobs, and it is high enough for any of them to helm a championship-caliber club if he has enough good players, a well-constructed roster, and a healthy dose of good fortune.

But I imagine there are teams that have been helped — if only slightly — toward a championship by their managers and teams that have won championships only in spite of their managers, so it obviously behooves the Mets to make the optimal choice.

I don’t know any of Mets’ four finalists personally. I’ve spoken to Wally Backman and Terry Collins, but never to Chip Hale or Bob Melvin. And I have not conducted multiple, hours-long interviews with any of them regarding their candidacies.

So I think it’s reasonable to defer to Sandy Alderson and his crew and assume that they’ve done a lot more to research, analyze and consider each candidate than I have. Almost all of my knowledge of the four men comes from published reports and discussions with people who have covered their teams. And all of them seem like at least decent choices to run the on-field operations of a Major League club.

All that said, if you want to know — as a couple have asked — which of the four candidates I’m rooting for (since Tim Bogar was never a real possibility), it’s Hale.

That’s not just based on my conversation with Kevin Burkhardt yesterday, though hearing Kevin rave about Hale’s attitude, candidness and relationship with the players certainly didn’t hurt.

A common refrain of the Wally Backman Lobby is that Backman has won at every managerial stop. But check out where Hale’s teams finished in his six years managing in the Minors, across three levels: First, first, first, second, second, first.

And Hale has upper-level experience over Backman, since he managed three years at Triple-A and has now spent four years coaching in the bigs.

What Hale offers over Melvin and Collins is uncertainty. I’m not sure that means much, of course, since like I said I think a manager’s record has a lot more to do with the players on his roster than anything he’s doing.

But both Melvin and Collins have failed at the Major League level, and we still don’t know if Hale’s some sort of managing savant that can reason or will all his teams to enormous success. He probably isn’t — even if he’s a good manager — but you can’t know if you don’t try. I generally root for the unproven upstart, is I guess what I’m saying. It’s like choosing the rookie over the veteran who has shown that he’s not particularly special.

Collins, in particular, worries me for a few reasons. For one, he hasn’t managed a Major League club since 1999, and that stint with the Angels ended in calamitous fashion. Second, he is very well-regarded in his role as the Mets’ Minor League Field Coordinator. And I think it’s reasonable to argue that, given the current state of the Mets and their farm system, that job is at least as important (and likely requires more stability) as being the Major League skipper.

So I’m pulling for Hale, even though I recognize that he’s a longshot. But no matter which candidate the Mets choose, I reserve the right to criticize him for some to-be-determined strategic miscue during the season.

Also, for what it’s worth, Chip Hale was the batter for future Met Rodney McCray’s SportsCenter-dominating catch. Shown here with way more Uecker than the original:

Happy birthday, Val Pascucci

As Adam Rubin pointed out, Boss turns 32 today.

According to this report on MetsLocker.com, Pascucci will be back for another go of it with the Mets in 2011. I have no reason to doubt the report — I don’t imagine the people at MetsLocker.com traffic in making up totally plausible stories about Quad-A mashers re-signing — but since I didn’t see Pascucci’s return noted anywhere else I’m trying to get confirmation from the Mets.

I’m hoping to get down to Spring Training this year. If Pascucci’s going to be there you can pretty much bank on a really awkward web video in which I ask him if he knows that to this day, half the time one of my articles is linked at MetsBlog, someone brings up his name.

(And I’m still happy to point out that the Mets fell a single game short after giving 151 plate appearances to Marlon Anderson in 2008 — nearly all of them while he was pinch hitting or playing first base or left field. Anderson rewarded them with a .540 OPS while Pascucci was slugging better than that in New Orleans.)

Anyway, I’ll keep looking for more info on Pascucci’s return. But in the meantime, here’s hoping he enjoys his birthday.

Matter matters

Reading this article in the Times, I got a little confused over the difference between anti-matter and dark matter. I poked around the Wikipedia a bit, and though I still have no idea what either is really about, I figured I’d make this chart to help sort them out:

Anti-matter Dark matter Family Matters
First conceived 1928 1934 1989
Created by The Low Energy Antiproton Ring, in laboratory experiments Supersymmetric particles William Bickley and Michael Warren
Product of The Big Bang Unknown Spin-off from Perfect Strangers
Accounts for 50% of what was produced by the Big Bang 80% of the matter in the universe 25% of ABC’s TGIF lineup
Current status Has been created in labs, but theorized to be absent from space Hypothetical, but inferred to exist Canceled in 1998 following disappointing ratings
Preferred storage method No container made of matter, since the anti-matter would annihilate itself and an equal amount of the container Not applicable Released on DVD in June, 2010
Confuses people because If the Big Bang created equal amounts of matter and anti-matter, and anti-matter annihilates matter, why is there all this stuff around? No direct observational evidence of its existence; could it be that gravity behaves differently at different scales of the universe? What’s the backstory with Rachel again? Why does she live there? Why is she wasting time that could be dedicated to Urkel?
Reginald VelJohnson? No Doubtful Yes

About this thing

I had a long conversation toward the end of the season with Wright about essentially the same subject. Actually, it was more me talking and Wright saying he was interested and to keep talking. The subject was this: I wish I could transport Wright out of the Mets clubhouse to a more professional team such as the Yankees or Red Sox so he could see how different that atmosphere was in those places.

What I told Wright was that I looked at him and a few others in the Mets’ clubhouse as an oasis around too much unprofessionalism. And I suggested that he had been at the party so long –- a lifetime Met –- that he was losing the ability to distinguish between acceptable and unacceptable. I pointed out various elements both in front of us about how cavalierly players were preparing for that day’s game; the lack of structure, discipline, seriousness.

Joel Sherman, N.Y. Post.

OK, I should start by saying that for all I know, Wright does have a problem with the way the Mets’ clubhouse has been run the past couple of seasons. From what little Wright demonstrates of his personality to the public, we know that he is an extremely hard worker and very, very dedicated player.

But him coming out and saying on the record that his teammates need to take their preparation more seriously would be very different from him just maybe nodding as Sherman told him that his teammates need to take their preparation more seriously. And I find it difficult to put too much stock in second-hand quotes from Wright via Larry Bowa, for that matter.

I’ve been through this about a billion times before and I’m not all that eager to revisit it, but problems in the clubhouse — at least the type reporters see — are almost entirely based on confirmation bias (and I don’t think players are immune to that).

The first example I can think of is the one I mentioned here: When the 2007 Rockies played video games in the Dodgers’ clubhouse before a game during their miracle run, they were praised for their loose, fun-loving unity. When Oliver Perez did the same thing the next year, he should have been watching video or something. The 2010 Mets themselves were celebrated for their attitude when they were winning; it was “toward the end of the season” when Sherman voiced to Wright his concerns about their unprofessionalism.

I think I can add a little context here, too. Since the Mets moved to Citi Field, it has become way harder for reporters to get a sense of what players do before games. In the locker room before most Mets’ home games, you’ll usually see at most four or five Mets sitting by their lockers listening to music or texting, and somewhere between 20 and 40 members of the media standing in the middle of the room, just kind of waiting to see if something interesting happens.

The other players will pass through — they’ll quickly throw on their uniforms on their way to the batting cage, or out to the field for warmups and batting practice. But they tend to spend most of the time before games — at least the time that the locker room is open to the media — in back rooms of the clubhouse where reporters can’t go, doing something that is presumably way more awesome than standing around listening to Joel Sherman tell you that your team lacks discipline.

The beat reporters who travel with the team might get a better sense of it because the players don’t have nearly as much space in visiting clubhouses, but I’m not sure anyone besides the players and coaches themselves is qualified to weigh in on the full breadth of preparation that Major Leaguers — even the Mets — endeavor to get ready for games.

And though it’s impossible to argue that the Mets were structured, disciplined and serious in 2010 — they were not a winning team, after all — it doesn’t seem fair to put those words in Wright’s mouth simply because he was too polite to walk away from them.

Early offseason deal roundup

It’s still very early in the offseason, but there was a trio of deals yesterday — one bigger than the others. All appear to have at least some implications for the Mets’ offseason, so I figured I’d run through them quickly here.

The deal: Marlins trade Dan Uggla to the Braves for Omar Infante and Mike Dunn.

Why they did it: The Braves traded from strength to instantly upgrade their offense with Uggla, who’s good for 30 home runs a year and an OBP around .360. The Marlins save money — Uggla earned $7.8 million last year and is entering his last arbitration year coming off the best offensive season, while Infante stands to make only $2.5 million. They also add a promising, if wild, young reliever in Dunn.

Local flavor: It means a) the Braves appear set to be pretty damn good next year and b) the Mets will not get Dan Uggla to play second base in 2011. The first point is more troubling than the second; while Uggla would make the Mets a much better team in 2011, to keep him around beyond next year they’d need to give him a pretty hefty extension. Uggla already isn’t much of a fielder, and he’s only likely to get worse as he ages.

The deal: Marlins and catcher John Buck agree to a three-year, $18 million deal.

Why they did it: Ahh… Well, Buck had a nice season last year, though it certainly doesn’t seem sustainable. Buck walked only 16 times in 437 plate appearances — the lowest walk rate of his career — and enjoyed a batting average and batting average on balls in play that were about 40 points higher than his career norms. And the Marlins needed a catcher.

Local flavor: The Mets will need a catcher as well. Josh Thole played well enough in his first 90 Major League games to earn the chance to start out of the gate in 2011, but a contingency plan and backup is necessary. Seems to me they’d be best-served finding a guy healthy enough to hold up as a starter if Thole falters, rather than a career backup like fan favorites Ramon Castro or Henry Blanco (incidentally, Rod Barajas might not be a bad choice). It’s way too early in the offseason to say if Buck’s seemingly too-big contract reflects some weird shift in the catching market, though.

The deal: Cardinals sign Jake Westbrook to a two-year, $16.5 million contract.

Why they did it: A two-year deal for a 33-year-old pitcher who spent most of 2008 and all of 2009 on the disabled list might raise some eyebrows, but Westbrook stayed healthy in 2010 and pitched well for the Cardinals down the stretch, and it’s probably fair to just defer to Dave Duncan on assessing veteran innings-eaters at this point.

Local flavor: With Johan Santana out for who-knows-how-long, the Mets definitely need starting pitching this offseason. Cliff Lee is out of their price range, and both Ted Lilly and Westbrook were locked up by their teams. There are a few decent innings-eating options remaining but it doesn’t appear as though they’ll come cheap this offseason. And there have been conflicting reports on the Mets’ payroll flexibility. If they really only have $5 million to play with — which I tend to doubt, honestly — they’ll likely be priced out of all the reliable starters on the market, and forced to take risks on guys coming off injury or bad seasons.

Email exchange with reader Eric

Eric emailed me to tip me off about a certain Mets-article I’ll probably tackle tomorrow, then we got into a back-in-forth about blogs as media watchdogs that made me laugh.

He wrote:

My friends and I talk half seriously about a site devoted to covering the NY media, because there’s so much of this stuff. Unfortunately we also talk completely seriously about the fact that we’re probably too lazy to do it right.

I responded:

I think it’d be really funny to keep a blog entirely dedicated to critiquing Phil Mushnick, Bob Raissman, Richard Sandomir and Neil Best -– the NY sports-media critics –- just for the sake of meta-ness.

To which Eric said:

My favorite thing about those guys is how many levels removed they are from what a traditional society would consider real work. You have a bunch of men whose profession it is to hit a ball with a stick for the amusement of others. In turn you have men whose profession it is to write stories about said ball/stick games. And then you have Mushnick, whose profession is to write stories about the men who write stories about the ball/stick games. I might just start the blog you’re proposing – If I’m successful, I could be a whole four steps away from anything that adds value to society. Then again, I’m a lawyer, so I probably have that covered already.

Scientists perform dumbest study ever

When asked to rate their feelings on a scale of 0 to 100, with 100 being “very good,” the people having sex gave an average rating of 90. That was a good 15 points higher than the next-best activity, exercising, which was followed closely by conversation, listening to music, taking a walk, eating, praying and meditating, cooking, shopping, taking care of one’s children and reading. Near the bottom of the list were personal grooming, commuting and working….

On average throughout all the quarter-million responses, minds were wandering 47 percent of the time. That figure surprised the researchers, Matthew Killingsworth and Daniel Gilbert.

“I find it kind of weird now to look down a crowded street and realize that half the people aren’t really there,” Dr. Gilbert says….

Whatever people were doing, whether it was having sex or reading or shopping, they tended to be happier if they focused on the activity instead of thinking about something else. In fact, whether and where their minds wandered was a better predictor of happiness than what they were doing.

John Tierney, N.Y. Times.

OK, first of all, Harvard researchers: Perhaps you can’t comprehend this from the comforts of your ivory tower, but none of the people who said they were having sex was actually having sex. No one’s stopping to answer your damn iPhone survey. I can practically guarantee that every single one of those respondents was a giggling middle-schooler.

Second, what? Just… what? So you’re trying to make broad sweeping conclusions about a field as complex and mysterious as psychology by asking people to rate their feelings on a scale of 1-to-100? What does that even mean?

How do I know how happy I am right now, out of 100? I’m pretty happy, but maybe I’ve never even achieved 100 happiness. And if my current psychological state is just amusement at how stupid your study is, does that count as happiness, even if it’s inherently snarky happiness? It’s all completely arbitrary.

Besides — you’re telling me that people whose minds wander are less happy. But how is it even possible to truly rate your current feelings on a 1-to-100 scale without comparing it to the ways you’ve felt at other times in your life? And then, if you’re thinking about those other times, isn’t your mind wandering?

And the quote from Dr. Gilbert. Really? So if I’m walking down the street and I’m thinking about anything besides walking down the street, that means I’m not really there? What? Is my mind not part of my physical person? I’m there, in the flesh, on the street. So is my mind. I just have other things to think about besides, “derp dee derp derp derp, I’m a walkin’ down the street!”

In fact, I often go for walks specifically to let my mind wander. And I love the walks when I am able to let my thoughts stray far from the activity and my physical setting, on tangents off tangents. Those are the times I feel most creative and confident.

So how about this, Harvard researchers: You continue your dumbf@#$ studies, and please, be mindful of every step along the way. When you make photocopies of your findings, just stand there by the photocopier thinking, “makin’ copies; makin’ copies; makin copies,” with every new print.

I’ll be here, daydreaming my damn life away and enjoying every minute of it.