Twitter Q&A-style product

I spoke to Santana at Mets Fantasy Camp in February: He’s the White Sox’ director of scouting for the Dominican Republic, I believe. Nice dude.

Ray Knight is an on-air guy for MASN, as you may recall from his on-air awkwardness with the excruciating Rob Dibble.

The Wikipedia says Danny Heep has been the head baseball coach for the University of the Incarnate Word in Texas since 1998, in which time he has led the team to two conference championships. Rick Aguilera coaches at Santa Fe Christian High School in Rancho Santa Fe, California.

As for the rest of them? Well, SNY’s Mets on-air team is attempting to get every member of the 1986 club in the booth or on the phone at some point this season. Not sure how they’re going to pull that off with Lenny Dykstra, but I suppose he’s entitled to one phone call…

(That joke completely stolen from SNY.tv video producer Jeff.)

I haven’t. But I suppose this is as good a time as any to announce my intention to review every sandwich in Citi Field.

This is obviously a pretty big challenge, so I can’t commit to doing it all this season. If you add ’em all up, there are a ton of sandwiches available at the park and there’s only so many I’m willing to eat in one trip (specifically: one). Plus there are times I’m at the park when I’m working and too busy to stop at the concessions, and times when I’m just not that hungry. Also, I don’t really care for fish, so I might have to find someone (most likely my wife, if I can talk her into it) to fill me in on some of the options from Catch Of The Day.

Thus far I’ve only done the pulled pork and fried chicken sandwiches from Blue Smoke. I ate a Mama’s Special last week, so that’ll be reviewed sometime soon. Eventually I’d like to rank them all.

Of course, I normally like to actually do things instead of just saying I’m going to do things, and I haven’t really come with the Citi sandwiches yet. But I figure maybe announcing this goal will keep me working toward it.

So I’ll have the Keith burger eventually, is what I’m saying.

I mean obviously it depends on the sandwich. There are plenty of sandwiches that practically have to be hot: Burgers, hot dogs, chicken and veal parmigiana, cheesesteaks, most chicken-cutlet combinations.

But if you’re talking about a traditional deli sandwich, like, I don’t know, turkey with bacon, cheddar and mayo on a hero, I’ll take that cold actually. Because of the way some cheeses melt, hot versions of those sandwiches get pretty greasy and leave me feeling a little sick. I always objected to Quizno’s big ad campaign about how grilled sandwiches are necessarily better than ungrilled ones because it’s really a case-by-case thing.

One note: American cheese doesn’t get greasy when it melts because of an emulsifying salt invented by Joseph Kraft. That’s why you can make such a good grilled cheese so easily with American cheese. Judge me all you want: American cheese is rarely my go-to cheese choice, but I still think it’s delicious.

 

Even Lenny Dykstra trying to distance himself from Charlie Sheen

Lenny Dykstra’s lawyers are denying that Charlie Sheen bailed the former Phillie out of jail after his arrest for bankruptcy fraud. Dykstra is also being investigated for soliciting a naked massage from a woman applying to be his housekeeper, which is fishy to begin with because there’s just no way a man in such dire financial straits should be hiring a housekeeper. Via BTF.

Ike Davis: Awesome?

Among  the bright spots for the Mets in the early part of the season is the play of young first baseman Ike Davis. Because of the amount of turnover on the Mets’ roster, on their bench and in the front office, Davis seems like he’s been in Flushing for a while now. But the 24-year-old has only 170 Major League games under his belt.

It’s silly to read too much into Davis’ hot start this season since it comes across only 95 plate appearances. But his .338/.421/.600 line in 2011 bolsters his career totals, and when trying to evaluate players it is best to use the largest sample of data available.

Davis can now boast a career 124 OPS+, precisely the average for NL first basemen in 2010. By the eye and by the stats, he has been excellent defensively at first base. And of course, Davis is a 24-year-old who entered big-league play last season with only 65 games above A-ball. So it’s reasonable to expect he’s still getting better.

It’s not reasonable to expect him to maintain this pace all season, since that’d place him among the very best hitters in the game and that’s a lot to ask for from anyone. But the hot start provides more evidence that he’s a viable Major League first baseman and can be a valuable piece of the Mets’ next contender, whenever that happens.

Also, his beard is good.

Yum foods branching out?

Yum Brands Inc. has made a preliminary offer to buy the remaining stake of Chinese restaurant chain Little Sheep Group Ltd. (0968.HK) that it does not already own as part of its ongoing international expansion.

Yum, the owner of KFC, Pizza Hut and Taco Bell fast-food brands, already holds a 27.2% stake in Little Sheep, which it purchased in 2009.

Little Sheep operates about 480 “Mongolian Hot Pot” restaurants in China, as well as several others in Japan and a dozen in North America. The Hot Pot concept involves consumers ordering raw meat, and then cooking it themselves in a boiling pot of soup at the table, similar to a fondu process.

Anne Gasparro, Market Watch.

There are a ton of KFCs and Pizza Huts in China, but I didn’t spot a single Taco Bell the entire month I was there (it was 2007, though, so hopefully things have changed since).

I did, however, enjoy hot pot at a place I believe may have been a Little Sheep. It was delicious. I know there are a bunch of hot pot places in Flushing and elsewhere around the boroughs and I’ve been meaning to go for a while, but if anyone has a strong recommendation I’m all ears.

Marry me Mikey P

Armed with the giant $105 million contract extension he signed last week, Milwaukee Brewers star Ryan Braun had to figure that he’d see an increase in the already-large number of marriage proposals he gets from female fans.

But who knew one woman would try to separate herself from the posterboard-toting pack at Miller Park by printing her cell phone number above her suggestion? And yet that actually happened on Friday night as the fräulein above made sure to place all 10 of her digits on her very earnest offer.

Duk, Big League Stew.

Good writeup from Big League Stew of a strange series of events in Milwaukee that ended with Ryan Braun reaching a cellphone with a full voicemail box.

But as a Shea Stadium employee during the 2000 season, I can assure you that Braun is by no means the first handsome bachelor ballplayer to be offered phone numbers via posterboard.

Vendors had to be at games two and a half hours before first pitch to get assignments. That process only took about 20 minutes, so there was a whole lot of sitting-around time. Usually I found a spot in the field level and read while the Mets took batting practice.

As soon as the gates opened, almost without fail, about five to ten women would stream down to the the area behind the Mets’ dugout with signs like, “MARRY ME MIKEY P!” or “The Future Mrs. Piazza” with an arrow pointing down. Often they’d have phone numbers on them.

Whenever Piazza emerged from the dugout for warmups, they’d yell and whoop for him — like everyone did those days, understandably — and he’d often acknowledge the crowd with a tip of the hat.

Thing is, probably anybody in Shea Stadium that summer would’ve happily married Mike Piazza if he asked. He was that type of hero.

Dr. Seuss, member of Team Ted

Dr. Seuss’s real name was Theodor Geisel. In 1925, as a Dartmouth College undergrad, Geisel — then 21 years old — and nine friends were caught, in his room, drinking gin. The problem? Prohibition. As part of his punishment, Geisel was not allowed to continue at the Lantern, Dartmouth’s humor magazine. A talented editorial cartoonist, Geisel did what many before him have done: donned a moniker, and participated under a pseudonym. In his case, under Geisel drew under the names L. Pasteur, L. Burbank, D. G. Rossetti, and one other — his middle name, Seuss. It obviously stuck — later with a made-up honorific.

Dan Lewis, Now I Know newsletter.

Who knew?

I mean, I knew Dr. Seuss’ first name was Theodor, but who knew he became Dr. Seuss because of prohibition? I think he just ousted The Great Gatsby as the best literary byproduct of the 18th amendment.

NFL owners can’t win, except in that they already have won because they’re billionaires

If the owners continue to push a lockout that has now been ruled illegal and harmful in U.S. District Court, they could end up being sued for damages. If the lockout is lifted by court order and the owners impose rules that restrict player movement and free agency, they could end up being sued for damages. Continuing to fight legal battles they appear unlikely to win could cost the owners considerably more than continuing the old collective bargaining agreement would have cost them.

It does not sound as if they realize this yet. They had this big conference call Monday night to plot strategy and came out of it saying they were still united. If these guys are smart, that will have to be nothing more than brave talk. Right now, the owners should be looking for the quickest and cheapest way out of this mess, and continuing to fight in court is not that way.

Dan Graziano, SNY.tv.

Good stuff from Graziano on Judge Susan Nelson’s decision to grant an injunction lifting the NFL lockout.

Baseball season has distracted me from the NFL’s labor dispute of late, but I’m happy the judge seems to be siding with the players. People dismiss the negotiations as “billionaires versus millionaires,” but fail to consider that a) there are many, many NFL players who are decidedly not millionaires and b) even the ones that are millionaires are undertaking a remarkably dangerous job that will provide only five years of healthcare coverage after retirement and a pension that kicks in at 55 even though their average life expectancy is 52. And when you’ve got the type of long-term health issues NFL players often face, paying your own medical expenses is a pretty solid way to burn through your coffers, no matter how large.

Of course, I’m not sure how much this injunction does to assuage those concerns. With 51st street currently lousy with pre-draft hubbub, though, I will say that it’s sort of shocking the NFL didn’t come up with a way to televise and monetize the judge’s ruling. Doritos NFL Injunction Special 2K11, featuring four dudes in shiny suits and hair gel barking about legal proceedings.

In case you missed the earlier reference

When I wrote “EVACUATE ALL THE SCHOOLCHILDREN,” earlier in reference to the Mets’ rumored pending fire sale, I was alluding to this bit. I’m not sure how funny it’ll be if you never watched Arrested Development, but then if you never watched Arrested Development you should drop whatever you’re doing (reading this, I suppose) and get about watching the entire series, perhaps multiple times, because it just might be the pinnacle of human achievement.

Actually, this might still be pretty funny even out of context: