Anyone watch Onion SportsDome?

I missed the premiere of Onion SportsDome on Comedy Central last night. Did you? I’m a little leery — as I always am whenever anyone tries to roll out a satirical sports show — but it’s mostly because I’m massively jealous of everyone involved and want very badly to have a similar show of my own. In college, I produced and hosted a campus TV show just like it, only far less professional and far more sophomoric.

I know that some of the upcoming episodes will feature former Nooner host and friend of TedQuarters Brittany Umar, which is awesome for all parties involved. And from the clips they’ve got posted online it looks reasonably promising.

Does it matter at all?

“That’s part of his preparation,” Lowery said. “There’s a little bit of gamesmanship in how he does it.”

Asked to elaborate on what he viewed as gamesmanship, Lowery continued: “It’s really about what you do. I don’t think he talks to talk. He speaks from his heart. Sometimes, there’s a misconception about that. People think that he’s being cocky, or just talking to talk. He says it because he believes it. Or he wants to.”

Of course, whenever Ryan tweaks New England quarterback Tom Brady with his comments, or has fun in a news conference at Belichick’s expense, pundits suggest that he is simultaneously providing additional motivation for the Patriots. Most Jets dismissed this theory Tuesday. A trip to the A.F.C. title game, a chance to end the season of a bitter rival — that should be all the motivation either team requires, they said.

Greg Bishop, N.Y. Times.

Good writeup by Bishop covering the Jets’ reactions to and opinions of Rex Ryan’s press-conference bravado.

The big question — and one Bishop and some Jets get at in the piece — is if it makes any difference at all what anyone says during the week? Is there any chance the Patriots or Jets actually derive additional motivation from anything Rex Ryan says in a press conference?

I can’t say for certain, obviously. But I’d lean toward no. As D’Brickashaw Ferguson suggests in the article’s concluding quote, it’s not like anyone involved needs extra motivation to win a playoff game.

It’s impossible to prove one way or the other, of course. I’m certain there are examples in which teams seem to have responded — positively or negatively — to public comments from coaches, players, owners, whoever. But we’ll never know if they actually did, or the game just happened to play out to make it appear that they did.

I suppose one argument — one that I recall coming up a lot in relation to Bobby Valentine — is that Ryan could be taking pressure off his team by putting the focus on himself. But again, there’s no way to know if media pressure on a team has any real effect on that team.

Antonio Cromartie says what we’re all thinking

Cromartie, in his first year with the Jets after four years with the Chargers, backed up Ryan Tuesday when he was asked by the Daily News if he’s ever seen Brady pointing after the Patriots score.

“We see that a lot. He does it a lot,” Cromartie said. “That’s the kind of guy he is. We really don’t give a damn, to tell you the truth.”

Okay, what kind of guy is Brady?

“An ass—-.

“—- him.”

Gary Myers, N.Y. Daily News.

Amen, brother.

Antonio Cromartie just catapulted himself from “That guy with all the children that’s not as good as Revis” to “total hero.” I wish more athletes said stuff like this, because it sounds almost exactly like I do when I talk about Tom Brady with my friends and family. I suppose after enough profanity-laced tirades you’d wind up in the crosshairs for a whole assload of media sanctimony, but sanctimonious media types are ass—-s too. —- ’em.

Later in the same press conference, Cromartie said, “If you’re an ass—-, you’re an ass—-,” which just became the frontrunner to be my epitaph.

Mets pursuing Dave Bush?

Rumor has it the Mets are pursuing Dave Bush.

Meh.

The upside to Bush is that he’s durable. I’ve long held that the ability to stay healthy and accrue innings is an underrated talent in pitchers, and it’s one Bush can boast. He has averaged 174 innings a season since 2006.

Problem is, none of them have been all that exceptional. In that same time, Bush has posted an 89 ERA+ and the velocity on his fastball has been steadily declining.

If signed, Bush will likely give the Mets around 174 innings, taking some heat off the bullpen and preventing the team from having to find someone willing to pitch those 174 innings. But Dillon Gee and Pat Misch are probably willing to pitch 174 innings, and they can probably combine for 174 innings just as effective as the ones Bush would provide.

Of course, it doesn’t entirely work like that. The Mets lack starting pitching depth in the high Minors, and bringing in a durable starter practically guarantees depth. Bush is a known quantity that offers a lower ceiling but a higher floor than reclamation projects like Chris Young and Jeff Francis, and for that matter Chris Capuano.

At Metsblog, Michael Baron suggests that pitchers like Bush that yield a lot of contact could benefit from pitching in Citi Field. It is frequently said (perhaps even here) that flyball-heavy pitchers (again, like Bush) could enjoy more success in Citi FIeld than they do elsewhere, and I wonder about this.

There’s still not a ton of evidence that Citi massively suppresses home runs. But even assuming it does — and it certainly looks like it does, even if I know better than to trust my eyes — does that mean the Mets should pursue fly-ball pitchers? The argument is, I suppose, that flyball pitchers might have more relative value to the Mets than to other teams, so the Mets could pick them up at a discount.

I just wonder if it really works out that way. For what it’s worth, the Mets’ most fly-ball prone starter in 2010, Johan Santana, far outperformed his peripherals and defense-independent pitching stats, at least partly because he allowed fewer home runs than you’d expect for a guy yielding so many fly balls. But none of the slew of fly-ball heavy relievers in the Mets’ bullpen did the same.

This guy is awesome at Wiffleball

Via the Score. Though this guy puts me to shame, I used to be a pretty dominant Wiffleball pitcher myself, though I haven’t played in years. I grew up playing against my brother, who I’m almost certain studied physics at MIT just so he could figure out ways to make Wiffleballs do cool things.

In my freshman year of college I played intramural Wiffleball and we played with a rule that if you hit the chair behind home plate and the batter didn’t swing it was an automatic strikeout. I once struck out the side on three pitches. Highlight of my athletic career. Also, most people on my floor didn’t appreciate that our Wiffleball team held practices in the study lounge.

Now, this

I may or may not be traveling for work tomorrow, which I will explain if and when it’s confirmed. The details are still murky and I’m trying to figure them out, but it’s making me extremely busy. So for now, enjoy Fishbone, and one of music’s most awesome bass parts: