‘Tis the season for giving thanks. I’m thankful for all the usual stuff, of course, like my family, my friends, Taco Bell and the fact that I’ve got a job in this economy.

I’m also  particularly thankful for these things:

Albert Pujols: El Hombre won one of the least surprising and most deserving NL MVPs ever distributed yesterday. It was his third, and I’m still not sure the guy’s adequately appreciated.

Albert Pujols is historically awesome. He’s placed in the top 3 in his league in OPS+ in each of the least seven seasons. He plays outstanding defense at first base and he’s yet to miss any significant time due to injury.

Many claim, for whatever reason, that Pujols must be older than he purports to be. But Pujols has posted his two best offensive seasons at ages 28 and 29, precisely when he should be expected to hit his peak.

I have no reason to doubt his birth date — almost exactly one year before mine, depressingly — and even if I did, it wouldn’t matter; he has shown no signs of deteriorating, and so should be expected to keep this up for the next several years.

And that’s amazing. We’re privileged to be able to watch Albert Pujols hit home runs. He alone makes the MLB Extra Innings package a justifiable and worthwhile investment.

Plus, Pujols is the rare transcendently awesome athlete who has managed to avoid off-field controversy, meaning we don’t even have to suffer sanctimonious journalists taking shots at his reputation.

Pears: Everyone’s all up in apples, and apples are pretty delicious. But pears, apple’s less-attractive cousin, never get their due.

Pears are great. They’re juicy, and they’re sweeter than most junk foods, and yet somehow they count as healthy. I’m still not certain on how that works, but I support it wholeheartedly. People might judge you for chowing down on Snickers all day, but people see you eating a pear and they’re all, “hey, there’s a guy who has his priorities straight.”

Why don’t we have more pear-flavored stuff, anyway? Candy and soda are available in a wide variety of fruit-like flavors, but never pear. I’m calling B.S. on the whole sweets industry. Give me more pear-flavored things, and maybe I’ll buy more of your product and less of these fantastic pears.

Spelling Bee Faint: The Internet has given us so many tremendous and hilarious videos to watch, and yet only Spelling Bee Faint has maintained a permanent spot on my desktop for the last seven years.

Watch this video. It’s not just funny that the kid’s eyes bug out and he falls down. People fall down all the time, and it’s almost always funny. That’s nothing.

What makes this moment so great is all the other stuff that happens. The moderator guy is the only person involved who shows any emotion whatsoever. A disembodied woman’s voice icily says, “Stop the clock,” because, obviously, all that really matters about this kid wiping out mid-Spelling Bee is how it will affect the rest of the Spelling Bee.

And only one of the kids behind him even pretends to help him out. Check out contestant No. 41. I’m pretty sure she’s yawning. The rest of them are pretty clearly trying to hide their excitement that this kid might not have the muster to outlast them in the Spelling Bee competition their parents have obviously been preparing them for since birth. Contestant No. 45 makes a vague, token gesture in his direction, but it’s about the least earnest display of sportsmanship you’ll ever see.

Then, against all odds, the kid just gets up and spells “alopecoid.” And he doesn’t even need the derivation of the word that literally knocked him over just seconds before. He doesn’t want it in a sentence. He just gets back up, collects himself, and calmly spells some word I’ve never even heard of.

You, contestant No. 25, are an inspiration to us all. Spelling Bee Faint is not just a web video about a kid falling down. It’s a web video about redemption and tenacity and the triumph of the human spirit. Also, the kid falls down.