The Mets unveiled their player-designed t-shirts recently. Carlos Beltran’s got an Affliction thing going, John Santana has a 7-Train busting through a brick wall, Jose Reyes’ incorporates elements from his tattoos, and Jason Bay’s looks like this:
My, what a pleasant-looking t-shirt. The letters and numbers are red to pay homage to Canada.
Tedquarters 
I know you’re on top of the J. Bay shirt, but the Jeff Francoeur Tiki Hut? How can you possible ignore that?
I missed it. I will have to investigate this.
Yeah, it’s pretty ridiculous, but on second look I’m actually way more stunned by how overtly sexual Johan Santana’s is.
Check out the description of Reyes’s shirt on the site. Who writes this stuff?
“Jose is big into Reggaeton which is a form of urban music. The front of this t-shirt has Jose standing in front of crossed bats that turn into microphones at the top. On the left sleeve surrounding the NY logo are elements from his koi fish tattoo. On the back is a nickname and number that is filled with another one of his tattoo patterns, the stars he has on his forearm. LA MELAZA is a loosely translated slang nickname.”
What does that last sentence even mean?
I imagine funnier than the copywriter describing the shirt would be seeing Reyes describe the shirt to the designer in the first place. “and I want the bats to morph into microphone.”
Incidentally, the wiki page for melaza in English redirects to the page for reggaeton, but the Spanish one describes some sort of sugary liquid. The Dominican man standing next to me has never heard the term but guesses it might mean molasses.
I have read that his nickname in the Dominican is molasses – akin to sugar, because his game is so sweet.
“I’m not your buddy, guy!”
“I’m not your guy, friend!”
“I’m not your friend, buddy!”