Select decontextualized quotes from “The Humpty Dance” that seem apt to describe R.A. Dickey’s knuckleball

Explicitly or otherwise:

- “About to ruin the style and the image that ya used to”
- “Allow me to amaze thee”
- “Like M.C. Hammer on crack”
- “The new fool in town”
- “Looptid”
- “Sometimes I get ridiculous”
- “Spunky”
- “You appear to be in pain”
- “Humpin’, funkin’, jumpin’”
- “All the girls they adore me”
- “I’m a freak”
- “Shakin’ and twitchin’ kinda like I was smokin’”
- “You can’t get near me”
- “Hey yo fat girl, come here, are you ticklish?”
- “I like to bite”
- “Really funny lookin’”
- “They say I’m ugly but it just don’t faze me”
- “You stare, you glare”
- “Like a fit or a convulsion”
- “Now I’m gonna do my dance”

Presumably R.A. Dickey’s knuckleball has never gotten busy in a Burger King bathroom.

Peace and Humptiness forever.

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