Big, big news today: Turns out Cole and Heidi Hamels have joined Twitter, and thanks to the @TheHamels account, I found the web home of the Hamels Foundation, the couple’s charity dedicated to educating inner-city youth and curing AIDS.
Now you might think such humanitarian efforts should afford one a respite from online humiliation, but then you’re probably not a downright awful person like I am. And the Hamels Foundation’s web site is a treasure trove of heretofore undocumented embarrassing photos of Cole Hamels.
There are so many goofy photos of Cole Hamels on the site that I had to focus on only the most embarrassing when updating the compendium here at TedQuarters. Check out that page for all of them, but here’s the clear highlight:
And perhaps my favorite part is that Jamie Moyer attends all these functions, and Jamie Moyer somehow manages to look awesome doing all the same things that make Cole Hamels look silly:
Tedquarters 
Why does everyone who plays for the Phillies perpetually look like they just got out of the shower? Their hair always looks wet.
it’s because they can’t stop sweating grit and hustle. Pretty boy David Wrongz always looks well-groomed because unclutch losers have plenty of time to get manicures and whatnot.
AND manscaping.
If I were at an amusement park and a creep old man like Jamie Moyer was on the carousel, I wouldnt let my kids anywhere near him.
Hamels may wear the pants in his marriage but his wife definitely picked them out.
Cole is always so happy whenever he has a hard piece of pork between his legs
My favorite photo is the one with Chase Utley and his grandfather. That’s touching.
Awesome handle.
Snore. “BREAKING NEWS! Pics of Hamels looking silly” is like “BREAKING NEWS! Pamela Anderson does something to her breasts.”