I don’t typically cover celebrity news here and I especially shy away from the basest form of celebrity gossip — that which deals with addiction, messy divorces, custody cases and the like — because though I realize it comes with the territory for celebrities, reveling in it feels a bit too much like celebrating bloodsport for my tastes*. So Lindsay Lohan’s slow, public fall from the heights of Mean Girls to the depths of her current state of being famous mostly thanks to some high-profile arrests and fame perpetuating fame has gone entirely uncovered by this site.

But now that LiLo’s plunge has, for perhaps the first time, taken her down into the world that this blog inhabits — both physically and thematically — I feel obligated to note the following news. And I hope for Ms. Lohan’s sake that she stumbles upon it and is somehow able to step back and take stock of exactly what it implies for her career and her life:

Late last week, Lindsay Lohan was spotted partying at an Upper East Side bar with Shane Spencer and Pat Kelly.

That the bar was four blocks from my home is funny only to me. That she was partying with Shane Spencer and Pat Kelly is universally funny.

Shane Spencer and Pat Kelly. Shane Spencer and Pat Kelly.

Oof, Lindsay Lohan.

If anyone needs me, I’ll be surveying my local pizza-delivery men and making sure they survived the evening OK.

*- So, increasingly, does watching football. But that’s not going to change anytime soon, so I rationalize it by saying that I use up my personal allocation of barbaric entertainment watching football and try to avoid everything on TLC.