Taco Bell Tuesday

And a beautiful Taco Bell Tuesday it is.

NPR reviews Crunchwrap Supreme: The big story is that the review comes as part of NPR’s weekly “Sandwich Monday” series, implying that NPR deems the Crunchwrap Supreme a sandwich. I’m not sure how I feel about that. Y’all know I operate with a pretty liberal definition of “sandwich,” but the Crunchwrap Supreme feels so distinctly like something that could only be created at Taco Bell that it straddles some (awesome) line. Though it certainly meets a lot of the qualifications for a sandwich, I suspect it is more an ingenious Taco Bell creation than a sandwich proper. NPR’s review is predictably a little judgmental, but earns points for several legitimately funny lines.

Taco Bell Train surging through the market: Despite struggling in China — its most profitable division — this quarter, Yum Foods announced five-percent higher earnings and attributed the growth to the success of the Doritos Locos Taco. I don’t really know or care much about the stock-market ramifications, but it looks like another early, on-target salvo in the forthcoming Restaurant Wars prophesied by Sylvester Stallone and Wesley Snipes. In a related story, Chipotle’s stock has dropped, a loss also attributed to the Doritos Locos Taco.

For what it’s worth to those curious, KFC is ubiquitous in China. From Shanghai in 2007, I joked: “The ominous Big Brother stare of Chairman Mao has been replaced by the perhaps equally ominous stare of Colonel Sanders.” A bit glib, certainly, but I wrote it after spending an afternoon in a beautiful garden under the watchful eye of the Colonel’s disembodied face on a second-story window in an otherwise historic area.

Cantina Bell reviews keep rolling in: Jenn Wohletz at Denver Westword contends that the Cantina Bell menu is not as well-prepared by average Taco Bell employees as it was by chef Lorena Garcia at a tasting event. That seems to make sense given my experience with the Cantina Burrito, but I have no way to compare the two because Taco Bell utterly failed to invite me to one of said tasting events.

Taking the high road: Mother Nature Network considers whether fast-food chains have “crossed the line” by “shamelessly targeting potheads with their ads.” This feels sort of like a New York Times trend piece, acting like this is a new phenomenon. I seem to remember a certain 2000 Jack in the Box ad in which an extremely handsome young backpacker wearing a P-Funk shirt tells Jack that he’s “jonesin'” for a Chicken Fajita Pita. The Fix, linked in the piece, sites a bunch of recent examples including Taco Bell’s “Late Night Munchies” jingle. First of all: Does anyone really care? Second, it’s sort of a chicken-egg thing. Does late-night fast food appeal to potheads or does pot appeal to late-night fast-food heads?

When innovation goes awry: HuffPo relays an unfortunate incident in which a Taco Bell employee included the cardboard Doritos Locos Taco holder inside a taco. The obvious issue: The person ordered a Doritos Locos Taco inside a Cheesy Gordita Crunch — as is recommended by this site — and whoever made it for some reason put together the entire Doritos Locos Taco with holder before embedding it in the gordita.

 

Will athletes ever stop breaking records?

Even if athletes never got any stronger or faster, and if their techniques and training never changed, they would still break records from time to time. That’s because the ability of each person who decides to compete, and the outcome of each competition, are affected by random processes. What happened on the way to the track that might affect the athletes’ performance? What’s the weather like? And so on. Every sporting event is a matter of chance as well as of achievement, and chance always offers the possibility of a breakthrough.

That said, the mathematics of record-breaking—also known as “extreme-value statistics”—tell us that, all things being equal, the frequency of world records will tend to diminish. At a certain point, we’ll have rolled the dice so many times that the chance of our beating our best score drops close to zero. That’s why new sports and new classes of competitors typically produce more records than old ones. Women athletes weren’t allowed to compete in the Olympic marathon until 1984. Since then, their record time has dropped by about 10 minutes, while the men have managed to shave off only five.

-Daniel Enger, Popular Science.

Good read on one of the more interesting aspects of Olympic competition.

Where they’re at

I wrote on Friday — and plenty before that — that this year for the Mets is mostly about next year for the Mets. Obviously the full season will provide the best and broadest wealth of information with which the team can assess its players moving forward. But since the trade deadline is nearly upon us and Mets fans everywhere are looking for ways the team could improve its standings in the short- and long-term future, I figured it’s a good time to look around the roster and try to determine which of the Mets’ young (and youngish) players should figure into their plans for next year and beyond.

The following are all the position players who have played in the Mets this year and are in their age-27 season or younger.

Josh Thole: Thole is 25. He has struggled at the plate a bit this year, but by all accounts his defense has improved. It seems reasonable to expect Thole’s offense to bounce back toward his career norms and, given his age, improve a little bit from there. That’d make him only about a league-average catcher, but since the Mets don’t have much in the way of catching prospects in the high Minors and since going big for a free-agent catcher seems like a bad risk, Thole seems like a passable option to start games behind the plate for the Mets in 2013 and beyond. Ideally, they will find a decent, righty-hitting catcher with which to platoon him.

Ike Davis: Fun with arbitrary endpoints! Since June 6, Davis has a .958 OPS. That’s the good news. The bad news is that he started out so poorly that a month and a half’s worth of excellent production has only brought his season rate up to a .718. Davis appears to have suffered a few more defensive hiccups this season than he did in the past. A strong finish to the 2012 campaign from Davis will go a long way toward convincing the Mets and their fans that he should be their everyday first baseman moving forward, and I’d bet on that. Davis’ career OPS is now at .785, a touch above league average for first basemen even despite his youth and his woeful first half to this season.

Daniel Murphy: While the rest of the Mets have slumped, Murphy’s second-half resurgence has raised his season rates to his career norms. This is Murphy: High batting average, solid but unspectacular on-base percentage, doubles power without many home runs. Murphy’s defense hasn’t been good, but it seems to have improved to the point that it’s worth carrying at second base to keep his bat in the lineup. He’s never going to be Joe Morgan there, but if he hits he can play.

Ruben Tejada: The future looks bright for Tejada, once dismissed as a non-prospect due to his lack of obvious physical talents. For the second straight year, he has gotten on base a lot and played good defense. The biggest thing, of course, is that he’s 22. Just being able to not embarrass yourself in the big-leagues at Tejada’s age is impressive. His .297/.361/.352 line over the past two years suggests he could be a capable-to-plus Major League middle infielder for a long time coming.

Lucas Duda: Duda, as you know, got demoted a couple weeks ago. His defense in right field was atrocious and he didn’t hit enough to make up for it. But despite his offensive struggles this season, Duda has been good enough in the Majors and Minors the past few years to suggest he has a Major League career ahead of him. It’s just not in right field, and it might not be with the Mets. There aren’t many teams on which hitting left-handed is a detriment to your chances of making the roster, but Duda’s handedness doesn’t help his case for the club as long as so many other lefty hitters are around. (For what it’s worth: Duda has been better against lefties than Jason Bay this year.) He needs to start playing left field in Triple-A. If, for whatever reason, he can do that better than he can play right, maybe he resurfaces in the Mets’ starting lineup before long. If he can’t, he’s trade bait or a Triple-A hedge for Davis at first.

Kirk Nieuwenhuis: I argued on the podcast recently that Nieuwenhuis is the young outfielder most likely to emerge as a Major League regular. It’s not now, of course, with the once bro-tastic center fielder heading back to Buffalo to make way for Mike Baxter. Nothing Nieuwenhuis did or didn’t do in the Majors this year should surprise anyone who has been following him since the Minors: He played solid defense wherever the Mets put him, he hit for a little bit of power, and he struck out way too much. The good news is he’s 24 and — though it’s easy to forget — coming off a mostly lost 2011 season. With more reps in Triple-A, Nieuwenhuis should be able to pull it together and become, at the least, a platoon outfielder in the future. Unless the Mets bring in a couple of everyday type players, look for that to happen as soon as next year.

Justin Turner: Justin Turner is great at throwing pies and coming up to the plate to “Call Me Maybe,” and is by all accounts an awesome dude. He’s a justifiable Major Leaguer on a team that needs a second baseman in a pinch or needs a low-cost backup middle infielder. With Murphy looking more like a reasonable starter at second base, though, and Ronny Cedeno around to backup second and short, Turner appears rather redundant on the Mets’ roster. That’s not his fault and it’s not necessarily the case moving forward, but if anyone’s willing to give up anything of value for Turner’s services, the Mets should probably go for it.

Jordany Valdespin: Without looking, how many times has Jordany Valdespin walked this season? Any guesses? It’s twice. He has walked two times in 111 plate appearances: once May 8 and once July 6. His early-career power outburst has been awesome to watch, but it is unsustainable. If Valdespin doesn’t start taking more pitches, he’s not going to get any to drive. Still, his transition to the Majors and to the outfield at his relatively young age has been strong enough to suggest he’ll probably have a big-league career. I can’t think of a great comp, but I’d guess his upside is as a solid utilityman, playing all over the outfield and filling in at second, maybe third, and shortstop in a desperate situation.

Mike Baxter: It’s easy to glorify Baxter based on a tiny, 65 at-bat sample and one heroic moment, so let’s do just that: Mike Baxter is the best. Remember that catch he made? Remember all the timely hits? The Pride of Whitestone returns tonight, and if he hadn’t cemented his status as a folk hero yet, he’ll do it now by taking playing time away from Bay.

Josh Satin and Zach Lutz: Neither of these guys got much of a chance in the Majors this year, but they’re both right-handed and both routinely hit well in the Minors. If Lutz — the more powerful hitter of the two — can stay healthy, it wouldn’t be terribly surprising to see him spend more time with the big club next year as a right-handed bench bat and backup to Davis.

So what’ve we learned so far this season? The Mets have a bunch of guys who appear apt to become capable Major League role players or platoon guys, a few who look like solid regulars, and no offensive player (beyond David Wright) who looks likely to become a bona fide star.

There’s no rule that you must have any set number of guys labeled stars to succeed, of course, and if the Mets happen to get career years out of Davis, Tejada, Thole and Murphy next year along with typical production from Wright, their offense could be very good. They should be looking for outfielders, though — especially outfielders than can hit lefties.

 

Sandwich of the Week

The sample size specter haunts me.

The sandwich: Cheesesteak from No. 7 Sub, Plaza Hotel, 59th and 5th in Manhattan.

The construction:  Thinly sliced steak with miso whiz, pickled jalapenos and Funyuns on a toasted hoagie roll.

Important background information: I’ve been hearing great things about No. 7 Sub and meaning to try it since I first started writing about sandwiches here. But until a few weeks ago, I had no idea they had a location in the basement of the Plaza Hotel, about seven blocks from my office. Also down there: a Luke’s Lobster, purveyor of Josh Thole’s favorite sandwich, and an outpost of Billy’s, my favorite bakery in the city.

What it looks like:

 

How it tastes: Either good enough to be a borderline Hall of Famer, decidedly too salty, or — most likely — somewhere in between. I had this one twice, and the experience reminded me how silly this whole enterprise of rating sandwiches really is. Please do not take the numbers I throw out too seriously. I suspect that if I went back and tried every sandwich I’ve reviewed here, I might return with an entirely different Sandwich Hall of Fame.

Which is to say: Small sample size, small sample sample size…

Anyway, the first time I ordered the cheesesteak, I watched the man behind the counter carefully construct it — toasting one side of the bread first, plain, then adding the steak and miso Whiz to the other side and toasting that, then painstakingly laying the remaining ingredients in an even pile on top and completing the sandwich. I can practically guarantee that Funyuns have never been handled with such great care.

Speaking of: Funyuns on a sandwich! What a concept. The snack chip on a sandwich thing is nothing new, but the Funyuns seemed a particularly good fit, especially on a cheesesteak. They provide some subtle, salty, pleasant faux-onion flavor, and they’re puffy and sturdy enough to maintain some crunch under duress. (Presumably it has happened somewhere already, but someone needs to try putting puffed Cheetos on a sandwich.)

There wasn’t an overwhelming amount of steak, miso Whiz or jalapenos, but it all worked that first time. I could pick up the distinct flavor of miso and the spice of the peppers on top of the slight chewiness of the steak. It’s almost unconscionable to consider calling a sandwich with Funyuns on it “delicate,” but that’s kind of how it tasted. None of the flavors were overpowering, it wasn’t too greasy, there was an interesting variety of textures.

The second time, this cheesesteak almost tasted like a caricature of the sandwich I had the week before. I don’t know what went wrong in the process (or what went right the first time), but I suspect the proportions were off. By taste, at least, there was less steak and fewer jalapenos and way more miso Whiz and Funyuns. The Funyuns didn’t present as much crunch but the salt remained, and the extra miso Whiz meant that saltiness and miso flavor dominated the sandwich. Still really good, mind you, just nowhere near as delicious as the one I had the week before.

What it’s worth: $12, which isn’t cheap for cheesesteak, Funyuns or no. Both halves make for a pretty big meal, though.

How it rates: 80 out of 100, the mean of the two versions I had.

Friday Q&A, pt 2: The randos

https://twitter.com/James_Tierney/status/228884044123881472

Well, Shea Stadium. But if you’re asking about the parks I’m not biased toward, it’s a great question. By my count, I’ve been to 30 Major League parks, and seen home games in every big-league city but San Diego, Oakland, Anaheim, Toronto and Tampa Bay. I haven’t seen the new or newish parks in St. Louis, Miami and Minnesota yet. Obviously I’m dealing with pretty small samples here. In many cases, I’ve only been to one or two games at the park, so my perceptions could easily be biased by good weather, good crowds or good games.

Anyhow, I think it’s Camden Yards. And I just asked my friend Scott, who has been to games in every city but Boston, and he agrees. Maybe it has something to do with being the first of the new-old ballparks, or maybe it was just so particularly well done that it prompted the trend.

It’s worth noting that I’m not nearly as hard on most ballparks as some fans. As far as I’m concerned, if they’re playing baseball there and I can see it, it’s a beautiful place. The baseball itself biases my opinions of the buildings in which it is played. But I just ranked the ones I’ve been to (rather haphazardly) and it came out like this:

Camden Yards
Coors Field
Dodger Stadium
PNC Park
Progressive Field
AT&T Park
Kauffman Stadium
Safeco Field
Nationals Park
Wrigley Field
Comerica Park
Ballpark at Arlington
Great American Ballpark
Yankee Stadium III
Fenway
US Cellular
Turner Field
Chase Field
Yankee Stadium II
Minute Maid Park
Miller Park
Citizens Bank Park
Busch Stadium II
Metrodome
Sun Life Stadium
RFK Stadium
Stade Olympique
Veterans Stadium

https://twitter.com/DShaw31/status/228884325570080768

Ah yes, a bands-with-bassists-as-singers question. I like both but I’m not way into either, but I’ll pick Cream because Jack Bruce is sweet and I find most of Sting’s solo work infuriating.

https://twitter.com/robValcich/status/228895097671000064

The site is burgundy because our man Adam Rotter had to color in the logo above and he said, “hey, Ted, what color do you want the logo to be?” And I said, “I don’t know, how about burgundy?” This site featured handsome autumnal tones for a while a couple years ago, and I thought it was about time to bring some of them back. I’ll probably mix up the colors on this new theme periodically.

Speaking of: The new theme is something of a work in progress, though I think it’s getting there. We often use TedQuarters as a guinea pig for changes on our blog network. People generally dislike changes to the way sites look, but the new setup should allow me (and, ultimately, many of our other bloggers) to do some cool stuff really easily that makes the sites more enjoyable. I haven’t quite figured it all out yet, though. Also, if you’ve sent me an email through the contact form in the last couple of days, I haven’t seen it. We’re working on that, too.

I also miss the Eddy Curry wheel, but all things must pass. Luckily it’s still here with me in the office, behind the dartboard on my desk, so I can unfold it and look at it if I ever get overwhelmed by nostalgia for the old site design.

https://twitter.com/Devon2012/status/228884027938062336

Like “jif,” like the peanut butter.

Friday Q&A, pt. 1: Mets stuff

https://twitter.com/Miss_Met/status/228884299250798592

That, Shannon, is an important question with a pretty easy answer: It’s R.A. Dickey in a landslide. The only identifiable sleeper candidate is Manny Acosta, who has in the past boasted the team’s most underrated hair. But if I’ve seen Acosta hatless since his return, I can’t remember it.

https://twitter.com/tpgMets/status/228884626251345921

At that rate? Sure. Hairston has done all sorts of valuable Scott Hairston things in his tenure with the Mets: He crushes lefties, he seems willing and comfortable working primarily as a reserve player, and he plays passable to decent defense at all three outfield positions. And almost all the Mets’ outfielders with a shot at a roster spot next season hit left-handed: Kirk Nieuwenhuis, Lucas Duda, Mike Baxter, Matt den Dekker. They’ve got righty-hitting Jason Bay and switch-hitting Andres Torres under control for next year, but it wouldn’t be particularly surprising if neither breaks camp with the 2013 Mets.

https://twitter.com/DanDotLewis/status/228884943546228736

This is really Toby’s department, but I’ll sort of bite: This might as well be a trick question, since the Mets appear to have about eight outfielders in the Majors and Triple-A who look capable of being Major League pieces but probably not Major League starters. At this point, it seems safe to figure that none of Hairston, Torres, Bay, Fred Lewis and Adam Loewen will be more than a Major League piece. There’s still hope for Duda, Nieuwenhuis and den Dekker to emerge as Major League starters, but they’ve all got warts to address before they do.

Duda will hit again, and probably hit enough to be a Major League regular in some form. It’s almost certainly not in right field at Citi Field, though, so for him to emerge as a Major League starter as an outfielder he’s going to have to take to left. Nieuwenhuis might have the best chance of anyone to wind up an everyday player, regardless of his recent struggles. He’ll have to cut down on the strikeouts and improve against lefties, obviously, but he looks good enough to play anywhere defensively and his offensive numbers look palatable if you consider his relative youth and all his missed time last season. It won’t take much improvement for him to become a low/middle-of-the-pack offensive center fielder.

https://twitter.com/TooGooden16/status/228885631395315714

I’ll guess no. Picking up Ramon Hernandez (if it’s only for money) seemed to make sense a week ago, but if the Mets want Johnson around to foster Harvey’s development, I doubt Hernandez’s bat is good enough to make it worth carrying three catchers. And I don’t think it’s time to give up on Thole. By most accounts, his defense has improved a lot this year. His offensive numbers have fallen off a bit, but he’s only 25 and his career Major League rates — the largest available sample — suggest he’s already nearly a league-average catcher.

Potential chupacabra surfaces from East River

The apparent ‘monster’ was found and pictured by an amateur photographer who was walking under the Brooklyn Bridge in Manhattan on Sunday…

On first glance it appears that the animal is simply a bloated pig – a theory the New York Parks Department insist is correct – but closer inspection reveals that the animal appears to have toes rather than hooves.

Online theorists speculated it may be a dog or, even more worrying, a giant rat. Other online comments suggest it could be an aardvark, a raccoon or something related to a possum.

Mark Hughes, Telegraph.co.uk.

So what is this thing?

 

As Hughes notes, the Parks Department claims it’s a pig leftover from a cookout, but it appears to have toes. And the vehemence with which the Parks Department is insisting it’s a pig sounds hilariously suspicious. Someone even suggested it washed up from an offshore animal-disease center.

Via the ever-vigilant Rob V.

Calm after the storm

A fierce storm pounded my neighborhood last night, violent enough to merit watching from my stoop under cover of the doorway. Rain pounded the street and sidewalk and kicked up so much mist that even the few parts of the air that weren’t occupied by raindrops seemed still somehow full of rain. Lightning strobe-lit the sky in sharp bolts and dull bursts. Thunder cracked… thunderously.

By an hour later when I walked to the grocery store, the streets were still quiet in the storm’s aftermath but the rain had subsided to a haphazard drizzle. I got home, made a sandwich, and sat down to watch Matt Harvey pitch.

Let’s talk about the weather: The Mets got caught out in an awful tempest after the All-Star Break, a storm like the one a couple years ago that dropped a tree into my parents’ living room and forced me to drive a half-mile in reverse on the pitch-black Taconic Parkway. Johan Santana and Dillon Gee went on the disabled list, David Wright hicupped for the first time this season and the team’s offense stagnated, the bullpen sucked to new lows, Lucas Duda got demoted, pitchers called out catchers, Terry Collins called out pitchers. Everything went wrong. Cats and dogs, you know.

Then Matt Harvey pitched.

 

Harvey probably isn’t all the Mets need to get through this. He’ll probably allow some runs this year, and he probably won’t strike out more than two batters an inning. At some point, even if he proves a clear upgrade over the Mets’ other options and a capable Major League starter,  he’ll probably show some evidence why some scouts insisted he wasn’t quite ready for the show. Hell, he probably won’t wind up the best pitcher in Major League history, and he probably won’t lead the Mets to a rash of World Series dominance.

But we don’t have any Major League evidence to suggest otherwise just yet, so we can revel for these next few days in undaunted hope. And even if we’re willing to be reasonable about it and accept right now that he probably isn’t all of those things, we can see the obvious signs of a strong big-league pitcher: a blazing fastball, a biting slider, a heartbreaking curveball. And we can imagine a near future with R.A. Dickey, Harvey and Jon Niese cementing the Mets’ rotation and recognize how it might become a strength. And then, holy hell, Zack Wheeler’s supposed to be better?

Even if the addition of Harvey isn’t enough to reverse the fortunes of the 2012 Mets, last night he established himself as must-see material, a reason to watch and dream on the Mets. 2012 was always supposed to be about 2013 and 2014 anyway, and now we better understand why.