Anthony covers the Indians for MLB.com.
Larry’s last hurrah
According to David O’Brien of the Atlanta Journal-Constitution (via HardballTalk again), Chipper Jones has told people he will retire after this season.
Usually I enjoy greatness, even if it too often comes against the Mets, but Chipper is the one Hall of Fame-caliber player I always struggled to appreciate.
I wrote about this once before, way back in 2007. It was early August in my first year with press credentials, the Mets weren’t yet anywhere near collapsing, and Chipper had hit a 470-foot home run at Shea. So I wanted to write a column appreciating his dominance of the Mets:
But while Larry Wayne Jones, Jr. has certainly beat up on the Pirates as well, none of his children is named for Three Rivers Stadium or PNC Park. He calls his youngest Shea.
So I had to go to the source. With a large group of reporters, I waited as Chipper slowly pulled up a pair of black dress socks, put on shiny black leather shoes and tucked his sky-blue mock turtleneck (seriously, man, a mock turtleneck?) into sharply pressed black suit pants. Then he spoke:
“I’m not talking,” he said, contradicting himself. “I’ve been nice to you for long enough. Now y’all started crap. I’m not talking. Atlanta writers only.”
Jones was angry, apparently, about a story that ran in the New York Post involving Alex Rodriguez and the nation-wide steroid witchhunt. To punish one writer — or more accurately, one headline writer — Chipper elected not to speak to any of them. It makes sense. Have you ever gotten a subpar sandwich from a deli? What other reasonable response could there be than to swear off delis altogether, forgoing any delicious sandwiches you might have found elsewhere?
Because I wanted to write a post that presented Chipper’s achievements — if not the man himself — in a positive light. I can’t, though, and I’m glad for it….
Now, I can continue to despise this fixture in the Braves lineup. I can revile his beady little eyes and moronic chin goatee all I want, without any guilt. And the next time the Braves come to town, you better believe I’ll be leading the chorus:
Lar-ry! Lar-ry!
If what Chipper’s supposedly saying is true, Larry Jones will likely walk out of the Mets’ home park for the last time on Sept. 19. I will be there.
Granted, it’s even money Chipper will be hurt then, and there’s always a chance the two teams will meet again in the playoffs. But I want to see how the Shea Faithful send Chipper off. Will he get the ovation Reggie Miller received at Madison Square Garden? Or will he suffer one last round of “Lar-ry” jeers?
Tell Mark Sanchez something he doesn’t know
In his on-air remarks, Sanchez joked that he’d gotten grief from teammates for his love of theater….
After engaging Sanchez in a bit of small talk, Chenoweth gave bystanders in the backstage lounge a good laugh as she walked away, exclaiming rather loudly, “and by the way, you’re hot!”
– Gatecrasher, N.Y. Daily News.
How ’bout the Sanchise, pulling the old “jock with a sensitive side” bit, straight out of American Pie. Oh, your tough-guy teammates make fun of your for loving the arts? Pobrecito! You’ll just have to take comfort in the arms of all the lovestruck Broadway fans currently eating this up.
And Mark Sanchez knows he’s hot, Kristin Chenoweth. He’s human, after all. He saw that heartbeat commercial too.
The Fernanchise!
“We have a new leader in the Most Likely to Get Severely Injured During a Walk-Off HR Celebration contest.” – Mike Salfino.
Yeah, after what happened to Kendry Morales, watching Martinez’s teammates jump all over him like that is damn near terrifying. I was even scared watching him maneuver around the opposing players walking off the field.
Also, it’s awesome and hilarious that the mascots are a part of the walk-off celebration, especially since last year I spent about a half hour in the bowels of Coca Cola Field with the guys inside those mascots, and they were themselves awesome and hilarious. I’m not sure if the same fellas are in the suits this year, but here’s (a small fraction) of that, from June. Also, terrible hair day. Good lord man, pack some gel next time:
Conflicting fish stuff from Florida
Apparently (and predictably) PETA is upset that the Marlins intend to put real fish tanks behind home plate in their awesome-looking new park.
PETA suggested the Marlins use robotic fish instead of real ones.
This is conflicting for me, and difficult to reconcile with my pro-robot, anti-PETA agenda. It’s the whole animatronic groundhog debate again.
I’m going to side with the Marlins on this one, though — all due respect to robot-fish — for a couple of reasons:
1) According to the HardballTalk story linked above, robot-fish cost about $250K each. Figure they’re going to need at least 10 to fill their tanks, and all of a sudden you’re talking about money that could be redirected to locking up Giancarlo Cruz-Michael Stanton.
2) While robots are cool, actual saltwater fish are awesome. No need to gild the lily. I imagine given a tank full of real fish and a tank full of robot fish, I’d probably check out the robot fish for a while because of the novelty factor, then go stare at the real fish for longer. Look at all the colors! How do they even make fish that look like that? Do they fry well?
Also, just look at how sweet this looks. Beats a brick or stone wall anyday:

Frenchy’s best comp
Jeff Francoeur, on fans catching baseballs at baseball games:
“It’s like going to a hockey game and getting a hockey puck.”
He’s right, you know.
Gilbert Arenas on shark attacks
There are these things called shark attacks, but there is no such thing as a shark attack. I have never seen a real shark attack….
We’re humans. We live on land.
Sharks live in water.
So if you’re swimming in the water and a shark bites you, that’s called trespassing. That is called trespassing. That is not a shark attack.
A shark attack is if you’re chilling at home, sitting on your couch, and a shark comes in and bites you; now that’s a shark attack. Now, if you’re chilling in the water, that is called invasion of space. So I have never heard of a shark attack.
When I see on the news where it’s like, ‘There have been 10 shark attacks,’ I’m like, ‘Hey, for real?! They’re just running around? Sharks are walking now, huh! We live on the land, we don’t live underwater.’
– Gilbert Arenas, NBA.com blog.
Ahhh, that’s a reasonable point I guess. I’ve got nothing.
Hat tip to my buddy Ron for an old link that I somehow missed.
UPDATE, 6:15 a.m.: Devon points out that Gilbert Arenas stole — or borrowed, or sampled — the shark joke from a comedian named Ian Edwards.
And now, for no particular reason, video of Japanese fans chanting for Benny Agbayani
I really hope large-scale choreographed chants like this catch on stateside:
Change we try to believe in
This morning, I went to Howard Megdal’s press conference announcing his intention to campaign to be the Mets’ general manager.
Howard is a friend and a colleague, and I’m always intrigued by offbeat movements within the Mets’ fanbase. I visited the ill-fated Jenrry Mejia rally back in March, as well.
And when Howard stepped to the podium and read a lengthy, well-penned speech announcing his hopes to run the team with logic and transparency, I couldn’t help but consider how closely so many of his big-picture arguments for how the Mets should be operated resonated with all I’ve written here and elsewhere. After all, on matters pertaining to baseball and the Mets, Howard and I frequently agree.
But here’s the issue: The Mets are winning games. Eight of their last nine, 35 of 63 for the season. On the year, they’ve outscored their opponents by 36 runs. They’ve been playing good defense and running the bases exceptionally well. Their pitching has been a surprise and their offense appears to be starting to click.
It’s awesome. Straight up. And while there are still legitimate gripes to be made whenever Alex Cora takes another step toward locking up $2 million of the Mets’ 2011 payroll, and whenever prized pitching prospect Jenrry Mejia throws a mopup inning with an eight-run lead, it’s difficult to complain about a team succeeding so frequently, and it makes fans less likely to jump aboard any movement to shake things up in the team’s front office.
And what matters most, of course, is that it lasts.
Through 63 games, the Mets’ offense has posted a 94 OPS+, a hair below average for the National League. But two of the Mets’ best hitters — Jason Bay and Jose Reyes — have significantly underperformed their lines from their past few (healthy) seasons, and it’s reasonable to expect both to be more productive offensively moving forward. Only Rod Barajas has been much better than could be expected. Second base has been, to date, a complete black hole of offense.
So the Mets should actually be even better offensively moving forward. Just having Gary Matthews Jr. off the team and not wasting at-bats should help them improve. The bench is much better now that it has got Chris Carter on it. If Carlos Beltran ever returns, that’ll obviously help too.
As for the pitching: Against all odds, Mets pitchers have been great this year, posting a 109 ERA+ that’s well above the league average.
Problem is, it appears to be fueled by unsustainable performances. Johan Santana and Mike Pelfrey have been great and should continue to have success, but neither has the type of peripheral numbers that suggest they’ll be able to keep their ERAs below 3.00. There’s certainly something to be said for pitching to weak contact — especially when half your games are in Citi Field — but as the weather warms up both pitchers will likely allow a few more home runs.
Jon Niese, who actually has a better K:BB ratio than either Santana or Pelfrey, has been great. It won’t all be one-hit shutouts for Niese as the league gets more of a look at him, but his performance isn’t terribly out of line with his Minor League history. Hisanori Takahashi and R.A. Dickey are wild cards, but it’s hard to expect either to continue pitching quite as well as they have.
It never seems like his saves come easily, but Francisco Rodriguez has been excellent out of the bullpen. His K-rate is as high and his walk rate as low as they’ve been in several years.
The rest of the bullpen has been far less impressive. Pedro Feliciano has a low ERA but has allowed an enormous amount of baserunners. Raul Valdes had been great until a couple of terrible outings in San Diego. Mejia and Fernando Nieve have both walked nearly as many batters as they’ve struck out, and Ryota Igarashi has been downright awful since returning from the disabled list.
Still, it’s hard to get a decent read on the bullpen since so many of its members are dealing with very small samples. And now that John Maine and Ollie Perez are out of the starting rotation, Jerry Manuel hasn’t been overusing any one reliever. It will be interesting to see how they perform with more rested arms.
So can the Mets remain in contention? It’s starting to seem that way. They’ve got flaws, of course, and it would be silly to expect the starting pitchers to perform as well as they have for the past few weeks. But an improved offense can mitigate that regression. The Braves appear strong and the Phillies will likely soon start playing better, but the Mets look apt to stay in the playoff hunt.